Is the end of an era on What We Do In The Shadows? In “Exit Interview,” Guillermo (Harvey Guillén) is on the run from Nandor (Kayvan Novak). Guillermo’s great wish was to become a vampire. He waited 13 years for his master Nandor to turn him. In a desperate moment, Guillermo took matters into his own hands. He asked his vampire friend Derek (Chris Sandiford) to turn him and Derek was happy to do so. Guillermo hid his new vampire status for a month. He also never fully became a vampire. Now we know it’s because his Van Helsing DNA was fighitng off the vampire change. Now that Nandor knows, he is humiliated and angry. And he vowed to kill Guillermo.
Guillermo ran to the only person he knew had no ties to Nandor … Derek. Now he’s staying at a shady motel and told Derek not to tell anyone where he is. Derek promised but then told Nadja (Natasia Demetriou) who told Colin Robinson (Mark Proksch), Laszlo (Matt Berry), and the Guide (Kristen Schaal). They all pay a visit to Guillermo to say goodbye. Colin Robinson visits to conduct Guillermo’s exit interview.
Meanwhile, Nandor stakes out Panera Bread, knowing Guillermo will eventually turn up. He sees a guy that looks like Guillermo enter the restaurant, but it turns out to be Patton Oswalt. Nandor apologizes for attacking Patton Oswalt, telling him about Guillermo . Patton Oswaltinforms Nandor that there’s more than one Panera Bread.
Nandor tells Patton Oswalt everything about his relationship with Guillermo. It really bothers Nandor that he gave Guillermo his friendship. He thought Guillermo earned it. Patton Oswalt tries to empathize by telling a story similar to Nandor’s, but Nandor makes it clear that this is not about Patton Oswalt.
When Laszlo visits, he gets distracted by the adult film on the television while talking to Gizmo. Guillermo goes into the bathroom while Laszlo watches TV. He says it was a mistake asking Derek to turn him. He doesn’t want to to die but more importantly, he doesn’t want to lose the vampires, his friends. He thought by becoming a vampire, it would bring them closer together, but instead, Guillermo feels lonelier than before.
Nandor and Patton Oswalt sit on top of a building talking about Guillermo. Patton Oswalt says killing a friend would really hurt. So Nandor should try to repair the friendship. Nandor gets angry. He told Patton Oswalt everything about how he was betrayed. He says everyone who betrays him should be destroyed. Nandor kicks Patton Oswalt off of the building and then gets sad.
The Guide brought Guillermo’s hybrid kids to say goodbye. They don’t exactly understand what’s going on. They just know that Guillermo is going away. Guillermo receives a phone call from his mother. When he answers, Nandor is on the other end of the line. He tells Guillermo to come to his mother’s apartment and they can discuss what happens next.
Guillermo races this mom’s apartment and his mom is showing Nandor pictures of Guillermo. She leaves to get some thing for Guillermo, leaving the two to talk. Nandor says Guillermo deserves to die, but he decided not to kill him. Guillermo doesn’t believe him. Nandor say she changed his mind after his friend Patton Oswalt passed away. It didn’t feel good to lose a friend. He gives Guillermo his word as a warrior and Guillermo believes him. Nandor says Guillermo will come home with him, alive.
They return to the mansion and Nandor says Guillermo will live with them as a vampire and an equal. Colin Robinson and Nadja start to complain. Laszlo reminds Nandor that Gizmo cannot become a full vampire due to his Van Helsing blood. Nandor came up with a solution for that. It’s simple really. Guillermo needs to drink human blood. Something Laszlo didn’t think of. Nandor gives Guillermo a glass of human blood. Guillermo completes his transformation into a vampire. He’s amped up and wants to do something. Nandor declares that they hunt. All of the vampires jump up to join the hunt. Colin Robinson slowly gets up because he feels left out.
The group of vampires go to a nearby restaurant and drain several people. One thing Guillermo didn’t think about was having to kill someone for their blood. Nandor knocks out a victim for Guillermo but Guillermo has trouble biting the guy. Guillermo says he’s never killed a human before. When he leaned in to bite the guy, he could smell his shampoo. He realized that guy was just a real person. Guillermo gets emotional and leaves the room.
Nandor appears from behind where Guillermos stood and says Guillermo is not ready to become a vampire. He pulls out the genie lamp and rubs it. The Genie appears and informs Nandor that he ran out of wishes. Nandor has just been carrying the lamp around. He tells the Genie to get back into the lamp. Since the Genie can’t grant a wish, there is only one other option.
Nandor helps Guillermo prepare for the Ceremony of Vampiric Transmogrification. He says they all went through the ceremony. They make their way to the foyer where every vampire they know is waiting, including Derek. They start the ceremony and the first thing Guillermo has to do is declare whether he wants to be a vampire or a human. Guillermo thinks for a moment and then chooses human. Nandor knew he would say that and says they are going to make it happen.
The Guide passes out hoods and Derek is the only one who puts one on. Laszlo holds a stake at Derek and Nadja has a hammer. The only way to turn Guillermo back to human is to kill Derek. Guillermo is reluctant to do it because Derek is his friend. Nandor says this is the only way. Guillermo can’t kill his friend, so Nandor steps forward to do it for him. Nandor stabs Derek in the heart and Guillermo falls to the ground. When he sits up, his hair is longer and he has a beard.
Everyone leaves. Guillermo sits next to Derek’s body. Nandor apologizes. The entire ceremony was fake. It was the only way for Guillermo to know what he actually wanted. Nandor thinks he made the right choice. He asks Guillermo to dispose of Derek’s body. Laszlo helps Guillermo pick up the body and take it to a necromancer Wallace (Benedict Wong). They pay him with the money that Guillermo gave to Derek. Wallace resurrects Derek, then gives him to the zombie family. Before they leave, Gizmo asks Wallace if he accepts Venmo. Nope, he accepts cash and gold coin! And Zelle.
And with that, What We Do In The Shadows goes back to normal. Until next season, you can stream What We Do in The Shadows on FX on Hulu.
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