DISCLAIMER: This Wynonna Earp recap contains more spoilers than the number of times Wynonna has guzzled a bottle of whiskey prior to sending Revenants back to Hell. Her diet is mostly comprised of whiskey and doughnuts, which are the two main food groups. You’ve been warned. Make your peace, and enter at your own peril.
Welcome back, Earpers! Praise be to Fandras, the long wait is finally over! Wynonna Earp has returned with a vengeance, like the resounding bang from our protagonist’s Peacemaker. Season 3 is already off to a rollicking start. Mama Earp is alive and in prison! Vampires glamorizing people with their sexiness! Sexy purple fog! Wynonna’s recurring d**k jokes! Nicole being a survivor of the Cult of Bulshar – the demon who initially cursed the Earp line! So many twists and turns occurred this episode. Now, let’s get to it.
Alright, ready to delve into “Blood Red and Going Down?” Just be sure to not poke fun at Jeremy for his One Direction obsession. He’s very sensitive about it.
We open with Pussy Willows – a bar (get your mind out of the gutter, folks). Nicole (Katherine Barrell) and Waverly (Dominique Provost-Chalkley), otherwise known as power couple WayHaught, are situated on a rooftop adjacent to the bar. They’re brandishing guns and ready to kick some major bum. Meanwhile, Wynonna (Melanie Scrofano) is having a helluva time inside the bar, riding a mechanical bull with a beer in hand. Ever since her and Doc gave up their precious baby Alice, post-partum depression has manifested itself in Wynonna in, well, interesting ways. She’s apparently more focused than ever on vanquishing Bulshar, while still being the life of the party.
Suddenly, Wynonna vomits and is promptly ousted from the bar. A slew of Revenants surrounds her, taunting Wynonna for having to give up her child. A drunken Wynonna still manages to open a can of whoop a** though, in the Earp-iest way possible. Dolls (Shamier Anderson), Doc (Tim Rozon) and Jeremy (Varun Saranga) are also present, lending a hand in the butt beating. Wynonna manages to use Peacemaker on most of them, except one. She grills the lone Revenant on Bulshar’s whereabouts, but he refuses to comply. She promptly sends him back to Hell.
Later, we see Sheriff Nedley (Greg Lawson) and his partner doing their shift outside Purgatory lines. A bus pulls up to the town border, and unleashes a horde of very attractive and well dressed people. One woman, Petra (Clare McConnell) saunters over to Nedley and brushes her hand against his face. Just like that, Nedley succumbs to her will and grants the group entrance into Purgatory. As the bus enters town, we see Nedley’s partner lifeless on the side of the road. Uh oh. Methinks these people are vampires.
Next, Waverly and Nicole wake up the following morning all cute and adorable, being their sickeningly sweet WayHaught selves. Waverly hears Wynonna yell from outside. We see that she’s in a bout of fisticuffs with Doc, as the two are training in the barn. Apparently they’ve been at it all night (no pun intended). Just when Wynonna overcomes Doc and is crowned victorious, Doc pulls away. Waverly finds Wynonna all by her lonesome. Wynonna explains that ever since they gave up Alice, Doc won’t talk to her unless he’s angry or they’re physically fighting. So, she tries to keep him angry and fighting. Waves reassures her that he loves her, and that he just needs time to grieve.
Then, Nicole barges in with a new case for our crew. Everyone heads back to the Pussy Willow. They discover an utterly grotesque scene within. Bodies upon bodies were purposefully situated in an unfamiliar symbol – someone is trying to send a message. Nicole recognizes this as the work of the Cult of Bulshar. She also explains that the Black Badge Division has been tracking down these mass homicides since the 1920s. So, this isn’t the first time this has happened. Interesting. Either way, our gang tries to get to the bottom of it. Nicole, overcome with emotion at the sight of one woman bearing that strange symbol, is escorted to the bathroom courtesy of Waverly so she can calm down.
Meanwhile, Wynonna finds a strange man shrouded in shadow, one who could be responsible for the massacre. She tries to elicit a response from him, but he runs off. She finds a poster with her mother’s name on it, and knows exactly where she must go next – to pay Mama Earp a visit. Perhaps she’s connected to the Cult of Bulshar!
Next, we see Waverly in the bathroom with Nicole as she attempts to pacify the latter. Suddenly, Petra waltzes in soundlessly. She touches Waverly’s face and immediately the younger Earp is smitten. Nicole emerges from her bathroom stall and is also enthralled by the vampire. Petra tasks them with the mission of capturing Wynonna alive so she can be brought to Bulshar. Uh oh. This won’t end well.
Then, Doc is in the bar and notices a disturbance in the Force (Hey, I’m a nerd. I’m all about crossovers.). He ventures to the basement and finds Jeremy partaking in a solo dance off to One Direction. Apparently, Jeremy is in Doc’s basement tweaking Dolls’ Lizard Man drugs. Suddenly, a curtain of violet fog descends down the stairs. Well, in the Wynonna Earp universe this is known as “sexy fog.” The vampires have infiltrated the bar, and even Jeremy is glamorized by a handsome creature of the night. Meanwhile, Doc is captured and dragged away by an unknown captor.
Later, Wynonna arrives at a prison where her mother Michelle (Megan Follows) is being held. Apparently, she’s been paying Mama Earp visits for quite some time now. Of course, Waverly is in the dark about this. Wynonna asks her mother about her connection to the Cult of Bulshar, but Mama Earp is incoherent. She claims to be hearing voices, and chastises Wynonna for dragging Waverly into this mess. Then, Michelle begins screaming. Wynonna is quickly ushered away. She finds someone and complains about how the prison has been treating her clearly mentally unwell mother and demands to see Michelle’s file. Wynonna is denied, but thankfully Dolls swoops in and uses his Black Badge status to retrieve the paperwork on Michelle. Woohoo!
Next, Wynonna and Dolls are sitting in her truck with the paperwork. He urges her to confess this secret to Waverly, that her mother didn’t just run off willingly. They share a moment that’s rife with sizzling chemistry, and I’m reminded that Scrofano could have chemistry with a brick wall and I’d be convinced that marriage was around the corner. However, Wynonna kicks Dolls out of her truck. Dolls encounters Petra, but her glamorizing doesn’t work on him due to his Lizard Man powers.
Meanwhile, Doc wakes up in a stretch limo handcuffed to a stripper pole. One of the vampires (Chantel Riley), whose bottom half of her face is shrouded, claims to have heard a rumor that Doc Holliday has been resurrected. If this were the case, she would like to turn him to the vampire side. Bring Doc over to Team Bulshar. However, Doc refuses to admit his identity. Thus, mystery vampire decides to conduct a test to prove his identity. We see his feet are submerged in a bucket of water. Mystery vampire electrocutes Doc. I don’t like where this is going…
Later, Wynonna arrives home and finds the sexy fog filtering outward from her barn. She finds a vampire within, but thankfully she didn’t succumb to his glamour. Wynonna barges inside the house, blood spattered, and finds Waverly, Nicole and Jeremy all gussied up for a party. She notices how peculiar they’re all acting. Nicole knocks Wynonna unconscious, as per Petra’s instructions. They plan to dress her up and present her to Bulshar…in a coffin. Only on Wynonna Earp would something like this occur, and be utterly delightful.
Next, we find our glamorized crew at a house party thrown for the vampires. Apparently, this is the last night on Earth for the residents of Purgatory. That’s right – they’re all going to be vampire snacks. Well, the VIP members (which includes Wynonna) will be presented to Bulshar. We see Waverly and Nicole chatting it up, dressed to the nines for the occasion.
Meanwhile, Dolls finds Wynonna snug as a bug in a rug in her coffin. She’s donning some Grade A goth apparel. Dolls presents her with a vampire slaying kit courtesy of the BBD, and I’m getting major Buffy the Vampire Slayer vibes. This is a good thing. Our duo finds a horde of wooden chairs and breaks the legs off to use as stakes for the vamps. Just like our ancestors used to do!
Then, Wynonna busts through the window of the house, making the most grand entrance one can make. She’s flanked by Dolls, and the two promptly begin staking vampires. Once the vamps who glamorized Nicole, Jeremy and Waverly are staked, our heroes come to their senses. Everyone is staking vamps, including Nedley. It’s a staking party now!
Next, Doc regains consciousness inside the stretch limo after the mystery vampire knocked him out. Apparently, Doc knows this woman, and referred to her as “Contessa.” He frees himself from his restraints and chases after Contessa. He jogs barefoot through the snow after her, shooting his gun to get her attention. Contessa, or Kate as she’ll soon be known here, reveals the real reason she kidnapped Doc. It wasn’t to turn him, but to save him from the impending s***storm that is Bulshar’s arrival. A moment passes between the two, and it’s clear that the pair has a history fraught with complexities between them. Kate disappears, knowing that Wynonna is on a staking rampage. Doc lets her.
Later, Doc joins the rest of the Black Badge crew inside the house. Only one vampire remains, and Wynonna begins interrogating him. He refuses to offer any concrete information, except that Wynonna is stupid for pursuing Bulshar. She allows him to roam free, so the vamp can return to Bulshar and warn him of Wynonna’s mission to stop him. Get it, girl!
Now, the vamp survivor of the house party massacre returns to Bulshar’s men empty handed, no Wynonna in sight. He’s punished by ingesting something that will turn him human. Quite the punishment indeed.
Meanwhile, Wynonna pays Doc a visit inside his bar. The two share drinks, and Doc leans over to kiss her. It’s a kiss chock full of passion. Rozon and Scrofano are just so forking good together. Wynonna is happy that he seems to be out of his funk. I am too. Next, we see the gang sans Nicole munching on Vietnamese takeout, and Dolls reminds Wynonna that she has a secret to spill to Waves. Wynonna and Waverly reluctantly leave the bar, and begin their drive back to the Homestead.
Later, Dolls finds Nicole back at the Pussy Willows bar. She’s still shaken up by the massacre. While her memories are foggy, she reveals critical information to Dolls. She believes she might be a survivor of the Cult of Bulshar. Whoa! Talk about dropping a plot twist!
Then, we see Waverly and Wynonna on their drive home. Waverly tries to guess the confession Wynonna is about to spill. Wynonna hands her her visitor’s pass from the prison. She reveals that she’s been visiting Mama Earp in secret. Just before Waves can properly react, Wynonna rams into an unseen object on the road, causing the truck to flip out of control. After the wreck, we see Waverly being pulled away from the crash site, screaming that Wynonna is still trapped inside the vehicle. Of course, this is the moment the episode decides to end – on a massive cliffhanger. Anxiety is now through the roof, y’all.
Wynonna Earp is back and better than ever. The stakes are higher too. Everything from Mama Earp’s reveal to Nicole’s discovery was shocking. Doc’s connection to Kate, the vampire. Thank Fandras that my Purgatory crew has returned.
What do you think caused the crash? Will Waverly discover Nicole’s revelation? What exactly does Kate want with Doc, and what is their past relationship? Will Bobo Del Rey return? Join me next week as I recap Wynonna Earp, here on Geek Girl Authority.
Wynonna Earp airs Fridays at 9pm on your SyFy affiliate.
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