DISCLAIMER: This Wynonna Earp recap contains more spoilers than the number of times Wynonna and Doc have engaged in a bout of verbal fisticuffs. Those two sure love a good battle of the words. You’ve been warned. Make your peace, and enter at your own peril.
Welcome back, Earpers! Christmas came early this year with episode 306 of Wynonna Earp. Or, should I say, Earpmas. It’s the most wonderful time of the year in Purgatory! Members of the original settlers in town were snatched left and right courtesy of Bulshar. Nicole donned an elf costume! Doc succumbed to a child of the night and became a vampire! Michelle released Bobo from his well prison! Oh, and Waverly discovered that her biologically angelic father, Julian, is not missing. Lastly, you may now refer to Nicole as Sheriff Haught, as Nedley made the decision to retire and passed the torch to the former. Sheriff Haught or Sheriff Hot? I’ll let you decide.
Alright, ready to delve into “If We Make It Through December?” Just be sure to leave some milk and cookies out for Wynonna. She’ll most definitely spike that milk with whiskey.
Now, we open with Wynonna (Melanie Scrofano) and Mama Earp (Megan Follows) putting the final touches on the Earp Christmas tree. Wynonna is sporting a festive onesie for the occasion. Michelle removes the tampon angel tree topper that Waverly crafted previously and replaces it with a more traditional angel. Tampon angels are all the rage, though! Can you say multi functional? Meanwhile, Nicole (Katherine Barrell) steps out of the bathroom in her elf costume, much to Waverly’s (Dominique Provost-Chalkley) delight. Elf Nicole is the best Nicole.
Later, Santa Nedley (Greg Lawson) is perched on his Christmas throne amid a Purgatory holiday party. He’s being regaled with a laundry list of Christmas wishes from all the town children. Suddenly, one child is lured away from the crowd. Bulshar (Jean Marchand) appears, whisking the kid away to an unknown (and certainly spooky) destination. Kidnapping children is not in the spirit of Christmas, Bulshar.
Next, Waverly learns of her angelic lineage. She begins pestering Michelle with questions regarding her father Julian. Mama Earp reveals that her romance with the angel, while passionate, was also brief. He disappeared when Waverly was born. She also divulged of Bobo’s presence at Waverly’s birth. Apparently, Bobo was saddled with the task of bringing Waverly to Ward. Ward wanted nothing to do with Waves initially, since she was the bastard child of another man. However, Bobo threatened the elder Earp into taking the child. Aw, what a good Revenant.
Then, at the police station, Doc (Tim Rozon) listens intently to Jeremy (Varun Saranga) as the latter laments of his failed connection with Robin. Little does Jeremy know that Robin was kidnapped by a sentient tree. Now, normally that wouldn’t be a plausible excuse in real life. However, this is Purgatory, and weird s**t happens all the time. Speaking of which…
Now, we see that Bulshar’s kidnapped victims are being held hostage in cages, at a lair in an undisclosed location. He seems to be experimenting on them. To what end is unknown. However, the demon himself is present, performing said experiments himself alongside his lackeys. Robin (Justin Kelly) is present. See, Jeremy! He didn’t stand you up…at least not intentionally.
Later, Wynonna is joined by Nicole and the police as they search far and wide for the missing boy. One deputy tags along with Wynonna – Charlie (Sebastian Pigott). They discover a sample from the child, who we learn is named Tim McBlake. He’s one of the descendants of a first family of Purgatory. We know that Bulshar is obsessed with first settlers, for some inexplicable reason. Wynonna and Charlie return to the police station in the hopes that Jeremy can study the sample they found.
Next, Doc and Wynonna pay Kate (Chantel Riley) a visit. They ask her what she knows of Bulshar’s obsession with descendants of the first families of Purgatory. Kate discloses what little knowledge she possesses – only that her vampire coven was ordered to separate first descendants from the rest of Purgatory. Oh, and apparently she tried to tell Doc many times that she was a vampire. However, Doc can sometimes be as thick as his mustache…which is very thick.
Then, Waverly stops by at Bobo’s (Michael Eklund) residence for a quick chat. She asks the Revenant what he knows of her father while brandishing a gun. Bobo recalls the saga of Julian and Michelle, and the latter’s insistence that he deliver young Waverly to Ward. Mama Earp knew that Waves was in danger, especially with the demon Jolene lurking. Ward, of course, wanted nothing to do with Waverly, since she wasn’t his biological daughter. Bobo threatened the current Earp heir into taking Waves. Blood or not, she’s still his daughter when all is said and done. Bobo reveals that Julian is alive, and not missing as originally thought. Time for an angel hunt!
Meanwhile, Nicole urges Nedley to join in the search for Tim. Nedley reveals that it’s time to hang his hat. He’s bone tired of dealing with the supernatural hullabaloo that permeates through all of Purgatory. Nedley promotes Nicole to sheriff. Go Sheriff Haught!
Next, Robin is forced to undergo Bulshar’s experiments by the demon himself. There’s green goo galore, and Robin is injected with the unknown substance. Thankfully, Wynonna and Charlie storm the lair with Peacemaker in tow. They lay waste to the Revenants within, but unfortunately Bulshar escapes unscathed. Robin and his fellow captives are released, free to return home to their families. Success!
Now, Robin reunites with Jeremy at the police station. Jeremy learns that Robin did not stand him up. The two share an adorable smooch. Ah, I love Christmas.
Later, our gang is enjoying a Christmas meal at the Homestead. They share a moment for Dolls, their fallen family member. However, Wynonna refuses to let go of the fact that Doc is married, and the latter withheld that information from her for so long. Wynonna storms off. She finds Charlie near his fire truck, and the two engage in a festive horizontal tango. Revenge tangoing at its finest.
Meanwhile, Michelle pays Bobo a visit. She offers the Revenant a deal – he helps her find Julian. In exchange, Michelle offers him his freedom. Mama Earp drops a rope down into the well for Bobo. Uh oh. This won’t end well.
Next, Doc finds solace in the arms of Kate. He reveals his desire to embrace the darkness – become a creature of the night. She then turns Doc into a vampire. It would appear Doc is immortal, once again.
Now, Wynonna Earp keeps getting better and better. I can’t wait to see where the remainder of the season takes us. Follows is a brilliant addition to the Earp family, and her portrayal of Michelle is pitch perfect. Her chemistry with Scrofano is off the charts, although our lead actress could have sizzling chemistry with a brick wall. The return of Eklund as the character we love to hate is also a welcome sight. Please, never kill him off. Waverly’s newfound lineage is intriguing, and I hope we get to meet Julian soon.
Alright, question time – do you think our crew will discover Doc’s new vamp status? When will we meet the angelic Julian? What is Bulshar’s grand plan? Join me next time as I recap Wynonna Earp, here on Geek Girl Authority.
Wynonna Earp airs Fridays at 9pm on your SyFy affiliate.
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