DISCLAIMER: This recap of Wynonna Earp episode “Love’s All Over” is laden with spoilers. You’ve been warned. Proceed at your own peril.
Welcome back, Earpers! We’re finally reunited with our sh*tshow and it feels so good. “Love’s All Over” can be summarized in one word: delightful. What a smashing reentry into the Earp-verse. It really is a commemoration of love in all its forms, shapes and sizes. The painstakingly hysterical Jann Arden makes her triumphant return as the vociferous Bunny Loblaw. In fact, everyone’s comedic timing is pitch-perfect in this episode. “Love’s All Over” is a stark reminder of why we love Wynonna Earp. Watching this show is like going to Olive Garden — we’re here, and we’re family.
Ready to delve into “Love’s All Over”? Let’s get to it.
Now, we open with an aerial shot of Purgatory and the Homestead. Wynonna (Melanie Scrofano) is having a nice alcohol-fueled jaunt in the woods with her Peacemaker in hand. She stumbles upon Amon (Noam Jenkins). The Glory Hole proprietor is feasting on a deer, because … demon. Wynonna brandishes her weapon and it looks as though she might send him to Hell.
Meanwhile, we see Waverly (Dominique Provost-Chalkley) and Nicole (Kat Barrell) have found the couch. Earpers, you know the one. Nicole gets down on one knee and presents her love with a gorgeous engagement ring. On the couch! Be still my beating heart.
Later, Nedley (Greg Lawson), Rachel (Martina Ortiz-Luis) and Doc (Tim Rozon) join WayHaught at Shorty’s for celebratory drinks. Well, Rachel is saddled with a glass of celebratory juice. Doc informs Waves that he won’t be attending the bachelorette party because of the rift between him and Wynonna. Waverly insists that their tiff is merely a blip on the love radar. Wynonna decides not to damn Amon to Hell with her “glowstick.” She just wants to remind him that she can.
Next, Wynonna barges into Shorty’s for a minute. Doc takes his leave. Waverly scolds Wynonna for being late, but it’s okay! Wynonna was busy making plany-plans. It’s time for Girl’s Night! Then, we see Wynonna, Waverly and Nicole enjoying the performance of an exotic dancer. A male stripper to be exact, so Wynonna’s totally into it. Nicole … not so much. Nicole is pulled away by another bride-to-be who’s lamenting about her absent bridesmaids. Waverly tells Wynonna that it’s a good thing she’s taking Nicole “off the market.” Wynonna reassures her sister that everyone loves her.
Meanwhile, Rachel and Nedley are chatting it up at Shorty’s. He asks why she’s not in school. Rachel mentions that she has nightmares about school involving getting up to sing the National Anthem and forgetting the words. Fun fact: Martina Ortiz-Luis is the official anthem singer for the Toronto Maple Leafs. It’s a sly joke on Wynonna Earp‘s part. Nedley offers Rachel a job as a barback, as long as she refrains from chugging the booze and never goes to the basement. Oh, and never bring up the fact that Nedley ate Calamity Jane ever again (RIP kitty cat).
Then, a man named Dimitri (Christopher Jacot) gets on stage to perform. Waverly recognizes him — specifically the scars on his back where his wings used to be. He slugs some shots with Wynonna as the pair trade barbs regarding love and how it doesn’t exist. He’s a cynical being. After Wynonna leaves to snag more alcohol, Dimitri forges a bet between himself and Waverly. He bets that love isn’t real. Waverly is unsure how anyone could settle an argument on that subject. Prior to fleeing the scene, Dimitri surreptitiously slips a bottle of something into Waves’ pocket.
Later, Waverly and Nicole make a pitstop at the police station to grab a marriage license. Of course, they assume the building is empty because Sheriff Clayborn and Mam Clanton are dead as doornails. And Cleo is currently missing in action. Waverly is getting affectionate with her fiancée when the latter puts the kibosh on it. Not because Nicole doesn’t want affection, but she believes her relationship with Waverly is special.
Suddenly, Bunny Loblaw (Jann Arden), everyone’s favorite homophobic mayor, enters the fray. Well, she was sitting there the whole time. A fragment of glitter winds up on Nicole’s shoulder. It’s from the bottle Dimitri concealed in Waverly’s pocket. Nicole becomes mesmerized with Waves. We’re talking slow-motion, angelic glow, movie magic love. She’s utterly smitten … and horny. Waverly attempts to fend off Daddy Haught while simultaneously demanding that Bunny give them a marriage license. Bunny should treat the couple like everyone else. No homophobia allowed here.
As they’re leaving, some glitter finds a home on Bunny. Now, Bunny is entranced by our Waves. It’s love at first sparkle! Later, Waverly brings Amon some apple pie at the Glory Hole. She pleads with him to grant the soon-to-be-betrothed lovebirds just one day of peace. The pie is an olive branch. He’s reticent about this until he’s gobsmacked by Waverly’s love glitter. He only has eyes for her. Amon passionately proclaims that he’ll do anything to ensure that Waverly’s days are filled with peace.
Next, Doc asks Waves what happened with Mam Clanton. She reveals that she doesn’t remember. Could her touch be enough to kill a powerful witch? Waverly just wants everyone to be in love and be happy like her. We must protect our angel at all costs, Earpers. Waverly returns home to find Nicole riffling through the former’s wedding scrapbook. Prior to Nicole falling under the love spell, she wanted to marry Waverly at the courthouse. Just a no muss, no fuss ceremony.
Now, she’s willing to go big or go home for Waverly’s sake. But first thing’s first — a wedding hashtag. Wynonna Earp playfully teases Earpers by having Nicole mention “WayHaught” as a potential hashtag. However, she quickly back peddles and refers to the ship name as “ridiculous.” These little inside jokes make me immensely happy. Meanwhile, Waverly finds Bunny Loblaw in her yard, arms overflowing with roses. She ardently professes her love for our Waves. She’s not good at the “gay thing,” but maybe they could watch Bend It Like Beckham later?
Then, Wynonna wakes up in the bed of her truck. She’s donning the same hat as the male stripper from earlier. Waverly gifts her with a steaming cup of a liquid pick-me-up. Wynonna wonders whether a demon is a culprit or if Waverly’s magnetism and innate charm made Bunny see the light. She decides to pay Amon a visit.
Meanwhile, Doc barges onto the Clanton Ranch. He finds the ever-decaying corpse of Mam Clanton propped up in a rocking chair. He hears some rustling and deftly procures his gun. However, he spots Cleo (Savannah Basley) huddled in a corner and looking forlorn. She’s beside herself. I would be too if I lost my whole family. Doc comes in contact with Waverly’s love glitter, which makes him see Cleo through brand new, lovestruck eyes. Love is in the air in Purgatory!
Later, Wynonna finds Amon lounging about the Glory Hole. That sounds dirty, but it’s true. Waverly visits Dimitri. Yes, it’s a love spell. Yes, he’s the perpetrator. He used to be Cupid, but now he’s giving the figurative bow and arrow to our Waves. A Cupid can only resign from their post if they willingly pass the torch to someone else. Waverly is definitely an upgrade from a fat baby.
Now, Wynonna is overtaken with love for Amon. But he’s still got googly eyes for Waverly. Back at the Homestead, our Earp sisters are gearing up for the bachelorette shindig. Wynonna is sporting a sexy top for, presumably, Amon. She discreetly hides the love glitter on her person before they leave for Shorty’s.
Next, it’s party time! Waverly finds Amon, Bunny and Nicole clamoring for her attention. Wynonna makes a beeline for Amon. Nedley succumbs to the love glitter and sets his sights on Bunny. Bunny takes the stage with a guitar in tow. She performs “Insensitive,” which is a real song that Jann Arden sings. Funnily enough, Wynonna urges Nedley to get Bunny “Jann Arden drunk.” God, I love this show.
Meanwhile, Doc is comforting Cleo. He’s proffering her advice. What’s interesting about Doc’s reaction to the love spell is that he’s not throwing himself at Cleo. He’s respecting her boundaries and seems genuinely interested in her as a person. I’m rather fond of a certain cowboy. Rachel overhears something moving downstairs. She swipes Nedley’s keys while he’s preoccupied and scurries into the basement. Waverly makes a phone call to Doc while she’s entrapped in a bathroom stall. Her lovesick posse continues to vie for her affections. Doc learns from Cleo that Nicole initially made a deal with Mam that involved him. If Nicole handed over Doc, then Mam would help free Waverly from the Garden.
Then, Rachel finds Billy secured in chains. Well, she hears him anyway. He tells her he wants to go home. Doc arrives on the scene and Waverly asks him to keep Wynonna entertained. Suddenly, Wynonna dumps the whole bottle of glitter on everyone, including Doc. Waverly lures in Dimitri by ordering takeout. He reveals that his saliva “destroys love.” That would’ve been helpful about 100 glitter specks ago. We see the crew are dancing with each other. Nicole and Wynonna are wondering “what if,” while Amon ponders whether Bunny is concealing an actual fluffy tail. Wynonna and Doc are grooving together and the sparks are flying. Waverly believes their chemistry is palpable, love spell aside.
Now, we learn that Dimitri and Amon used to be in a relationship. But then, one day, Amon changed the locks. Claimed he wasn’t interested in Dimitri anymore. Waverly suspects that Dimitri’s cynicism is derived from nursing a broken heart. Next, Waves and Dimitri shoot “arrows” at everyone’s butts to break the spell, because love “lives in the butt.” Doc breaks off his embrace with Wynonna, much to her dismay. Bunny, Nedley and Nicole laugh at themselves. Bunny claims she now understands the love that Waverly and Nicole share. She still proceeds to call them both lesbians, even though Nicole firmly reminds her that Waverly’s bisexual. I’m here for the non-bi erasure! Nicole’s a good egg.
Meanwhile, Cleo chops up Mam’s corpse and feeds it to the Reapers on the ranch. Her Clanton relatives. Wynonna stops by the Glory Hole to seduce Amon. Their sexual chemistry is electrifying. Sizzling, even. As much as I love WynDoc, I’m also down for whatever’s happening here. However, it’s clear that Wynonna is turning to Amon because Doc rebuffed her. Amon reveals that he let Dimitri yell at him about how “he’s a monster.” Wynonna feels she can relate given that Doc more than disagreed with how she shot Sheriff Clayborn in the back. “I’m tired of feeling guilty for what I am when what I am is necessary,” she says. In short, our girl’s going through the wringer right now.
Later, Billy comes home to Cleo. He’s invisible, of course. Cleo vows to make their enemies pay. Vengeance will be the Clantons!
God, it’s so good to be back. Friday nights have been sorely lacking because of Wynonna Earp‘s prolonged absence. But the sh*tshow is here, and I’m not getting off the Earp train. “Love’s All Over” is rife with Wynonna Earp‘s signature snarky one-liners, delightful magical antics and even a smattering of heartbreak. And sexiness! Give me all the sexiness.
We back, honey! Join me next week as I recap Wynonna Earp, here on Geek Girl Authority.
Wynonna Earp airs Fridays at 10 pm on your Syfy affiliate.
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