DISCLAIMER: This recap of The Magicians contains more spoilers than the number of times Penny has attempted to astral project into random objects. Hey, being a penny isn’t as easy as it sounds. You’ve been warned. Prepare for your epic quest, and enter at your own peril. 

Welcome back, Fillorians! The Magicians blessed us this week with another magical chapter in a stellar season. First off, we finally saw Felicia Day! She made her debut as the eager dragon fanatic Poppy Klein, who encountered The Muntjac after being stranded for weeks on a raft at sea. Meanwhile, Julia aided Alice in the execution of a potentially life-threatening spell – one that involved ’90s toys and incubus tails. Yes, you read that correctly. However, the spell was a smashing success and now Alice has magic again. Margo and Eliot hatched a plan to take down the Fairy Queen that involves Fairy eggs. Get it? “Hatched?” My gift for comedy is merely untapped potential. 

Alright, ready to delve into “Do You Like Teeth?” Just be sure to please feed the sea dragons. They get awfully peckish if you don’t. 

We open with Alice (Olivia Taylor Dudley) feverishly jotting down notes. Multiple books lay sprawled out before her. Julia (Stella Maeve) enters with a box chock full of vintage toys. Well, by vintage I mean ’90s. Hey, I grew up in that era, therefore it’s not considered “vintage” to me. As it turns out, Julia knows of a spell Marina (may she rest in peace) was infamous for using – one that can transfer magic. Just what the doctor ordered! Next, our dynamic duo constructs an electrical conductor of sorts from said toys. They’re in the midst of spell casting when a Billy Bass toy begins to sing of its own volition. Julia nicks the third golden key, knowing full well who the culprit is. Penny (Arjun Gupta) appears, urging our newfound pair to lay off the spell. He claims to have seen it in action, and it ain’t pretty. 

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Pictured: Olivia Taylor Dudley and Stella Maeve

Later, the girls pay a visit to Fogg (Rick Worthy) and fill the soon-to-be former dean in on the magical details. Fogg has spent the majority of his time in a drunken stupor, preparing for the inevitable collapse of Brakebills. He knows of the spell they’re attempting to cast, since Marina was the one who stole it from him. Bingo! Initially, Fogg dismisses Alice and Julia’s mission as one doomed to fail. However, after Julia repairs Fogg’s glasses so he has temporary eyesight, the dean changes his tune. He agrees to lend them a helping hand. Teamwork makes the dream work!

Meanwhile, Margo (Summer Bishil) is strolling down the corridors of Castle Whitespire with the Stone Queen (Dina Meyer) in tow. Our fierce High Queen Margo the Destroyer apologizes for not having consummated her marriage to Fomar. The Stone Queen accepts said apology and looks to forge an alliance with Margo in regards to the Fairy Queen’s take down. The enemy of my enemy is my friend, indeed. However, the prospects of an alliance go sour when the Stone Queen throws Margo into the dungeon with Fomar (Nicholas Coombe) as a trap. Time to whip up some heirs! Margo, enraged, demands to be released. She is not having it today. 

Then, we see Alice and Julia in a swanky office in the heart of Manhattan. They’re meeting with Fogg’s connection, an Incubus (Ben Wilkinson). Not to be confused with the band, of course. They need the flesh of a living magical creature to properly execute the spell. So, the Incubus gives them his tail. It’s okay, he grows a new one every spring. 

Next, the Fairy Queen (Candis Cayne) meets with Eliot (Hale Appleman) in the throne room. She has a mission for him – make sure that Margo copulates with her new husband at all costs. An alliance between the Mountain people and the Fairies is of the utmost importance. Should he refuse to help, she’ll use his various extremities as new accessories. If a queen is not properly accessorized, is she really a queen? Eliot reluctantly obliges. 

Later, Margo gives her version of “the birds and the bees” talk to Fomar. She procures a thick volume on the anatomy of a woman. Margo conjures a few white lies sprinkled with truths – just enough to scare the adolescent out of sex. She even hints that a woman’s vagina contains teeth, a nod to the 2007 film Teeth, which starred none other than Hale Appleman. Everything has come full circle! 

Meanwhile, Eliot finds Quentin (Jason Ralph) masquerading as a guard. They attempt to plan out the next chapter of their quest. The next key they seek lies in a region known as The Abyss, where perpetual night exists round the clock. Eliot urges Q to take this mission solo, since he needs to be by Margo’s side. Queliot briefly embraces before Q leaves, and my heart grew three sizes because of said embrace. 

Pictured: Hale Appleman, Jason Ralph and my new favorite hat.

Later, we see Quentin aboard The Muntjac, wind in his hair and a billowing sail at his back. Benedict (Harvey Guillen) has accompanied him for the journey. Everything is fine and dandy so far – Quentin eats, sleeps, drinks and is generally merry. Suddenly, The Muntjac is steeped in a pervasive darkness, and Benedict informs Q that they’re officially in The Abyss. Time to hunt that key! However, Quentin hears someone screaming and launches into hero mode. He rescues a sopping wet woman named Poppy (Felicia Day), an enthusiastic former Brakebills student who inexplicably ended up in Fillory. Let the mystery unravel!

Next, Eliot receives a note from Prince Ess. Ess was thrown into prison in the previous episode for supposedly attempting to murder Micah, but was promptly released after Fomar did his own brother in. Said note proves to be informative as Eliot meets with the Fairy Queen for a proposition. Humans don’t mate in captivity, they require open spaces and fresh air. Eliot offers to take the lovebirds north to a forest rife with an aphrodisiac-esque magic. You know, trees to get the juices flowing. The Fairy Queen allows this, but overtly reminds Eliot of her ability to turn his appendages into accessories. The latest in Fillorian fashion. 

Then, after a few drinks, Poppy reveals how she wound up in Fillory. She was with a group from Brakebills who stumbled into the magical land by chance. Josh was apparently among them as well. They found one of the golden keys. Jackpot! Poppy offers to give said key to Quentin, which he eagerly snatches up. 

Pictured: Felicia Day

Meanwhile, Incubus tail in hand, our dynamic duo attempts to execute the magical transfer spell once more. Penny watches from afar. Hyman (Dustin Ingram) appears at his side. They observe Julia and Alice try multiple times to get the spell just right. Hyman suggests that Penny simply leave if the sight of his friends is unbearable. Why put himself through misery when he could become privy to a more exciting story? Astral projectors really are peeping Toms. Anyway, Julia and Alice are successful, which means the latter should be magically charged by now. 

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Next, Poppy and Quentin become increasingly more intoxicated, which is always fun on a boat. Poppy loves dragons, probably more than people I’d wager. She survived on her raft for three weeks, all alone in the dark Abyss. After she leaves, Q nearly jumps out of his skin when a familiar face pops into view – his own. A hallucination of himself has materialized before him, and he’s mean. This Quentin is somehow even more jaded than the actual Quentin. He tries to make our Q feel worthless. Well, not today, Satan!

Later, Quentin confronts Poppy about his newfound friend. Poppy mentions that this key can conjure up hallucinations, particularly one of the person holding said key. These hallucinations, like depression personified, convince the key holder to commit suicide. Remember the little devil on your shoulder? That devil is you. Poppy recounts that her group attempted to survive it by intermittently passing the key among themselves. However, quite a few of her group mates succumbed to the darkness and committed suicide anyway. A montage plays out of Q trying to ignore his hallucinatory self. But, a depressed Q can be quite convincing. 

Then, Margo, Fomar and Eliot are sequestered away in a carriage, bound for the aphrodisiac forest. Eliot offers the married couple wine to celebrate their consummation. Margo sees this as an act of betrayal – surely her El can’t be going along with the marriage bed thing? However, when Fomar slumps over dead asleep, Margo realizes that Eliot had another plan going all along. Yay! Now, time to take down some Fairies. 

Pictured: Nicholas Coombe and Summer Bishil

Next, our High King and Queen arrive in the aphrodisiac forest – but all the plants are gone. Everything that could rev up some biological engines is nowhere to be found. Of course, our favorite duo suspects that Fairies could be behind this. Makes sense. 

Meanwhile, Quentin orders Benedict to tie him up to the mast, and keep him safely bound until they arrive at Whitespire. We see Q is holding the golden key which is making his hallucinations worse. 

Then, Alice meets Fogg and repairs his glasses to demonstrate her magical abilities. Fogg is impressed that the spell worked. However, he urges Alice to be cautious. Alice dismisses his warning, vowing to cultivate her abilities and hopefully reach her previous skill level. Bring it on!

Now, Eliot and Margo are surrounded by a plethora of mushrooms. They realize that the incessantly hot and sticky weather can be attributed to the Fairies. They’re attempting to change the Fillorian climate to suit their needs. Margo pulls up one of the mushrooms and is horrified to find a Fairy embryo attached to the bottom. Those pesky foes are growing an army on Fillorian soil! Thankfully, we have Eliot and Margo to save the day (and look good while doing it).

Meanwhile, Quentin accidentally reveals to Poppy that the golden keys not only possess individual gifts, but they can also be used as portals. Poppy nicks the golden key on Q’s person and makes a break for below decks. Quentin orders Benedict to track her down at all costs. 

Then, back in the carriage en route to Whitespire, Eliot sees that Margo stole some of the Fairy embryos as payback. Time to retaliate, y’all. Fomar wakes from his wine induced stupor. Margo and Eliot both convince Fomar that they had amazing intercourse, despite nothing of the sort actually happening. Fomar complains of pain in the downstairs region, and Margo references Teeth, which of course makes my heart happy. 

Pictured: The best photo of Summer Bishil that ever existed.

Next, Benedict returns with the golden key in hand. He caught Poppy trying to unlock a door with said key. However, since Benedict is in contact with the key he’s clearly traumatized. He stumbles toward the edge of the ship. Q does his best to convince his friend not to jump. Unfortunately, his efforts fall short as Benedict tumbles off the side of The Muntjac into the waters below. RIP Benedict Pickwick. You loved maps…a lot. Suddenly, a large dragon head emerges from the waters, and we see said beast consume Benedict and the key in one gulp. The dragon returns to the watery depths of the sea. Well, that got dramatic very quickly. 

Meanwhile, Penny uses the Billy Bass toy to communicate with Julia. Julia grabs her golden key so she can see him. Penny reveals that he’s leaving. It’s time for him to move on from the group. Julia feebly attempts to prevent him from doing so, especially since he’s not really dead. However, Penny is stubborn. That’s why we love him. 

Later, a magic free Julia is enjoying some reading time in the park when Reynard (Mackenzie Astin) rears his ugly head. He gets under her skin, reminding her that he’s still out there. Thankfully, Julia wakes up and it’s all a nightmare. A sick, twisted nightmare. 

Then, Quentin and Poppy decide how to retrieve the key. As much as it feels terrible holding it, it’s still necessary for saving magic. Poppy unleashes a horde of dragon information on Q. Dragons are portals themselves, so people that are consumed don’t really die. Q believes that particular dragon must be a portal to the Underworld. They travel there and they can save the key and Benedict. A two for one deal! Let the epic quest continue!

Pictured: Arjun Gupta

Meanwhile, Alice informs Penny that she’s “knitting” a new body for him, just as Mayakovsky made one for her. We see her utilizing magic to “knit” bones together, creating a skeletal structure for a proper foundation. Penny is in awe of her work and appreciative of her help. Finally, someone who can help! Suddenly, Alice slumps to the ground, violently seizing and foaming at the mouth. Penny attempts to bring the Billy Bass toy to the life in the hopes of snagging someone’s attention. Unfortunately, no one else is home. Penny helplessly watches Alice suffer. 

The Magicians continues to improve week after week. Magic may be dead on Earth as it is in Fillory, but this series never fails to be magical for me. This episode presented some interesting predicaments – Q’s newfound quest may take him to the Underworld once again to retrieve a key and Benedict. Alice’s seemingly bad reaction to the spell. Well, technically that magic isn’t for her, but for Julia. Margo and Eliot’s Fairy embryo discovery, and the unveiling of their foe’s true plans. Dragons, dragons and more dragons! Any excuse to go Game of Thrones should always be enacted. 

Do you think Alice was having a bad reaction to the magical transfer spell? Will Julia ever finish off Reynard? How will Margo and Eliot retaliate against the Fairies? Will Quentin take Poppy along with him to the Underworld? Join me next week as I continue to recap The Magicians, here on Geek Girl Authority. 

The Magicians airs Wednesdays at 9pm on your SyFy affiliate. 

 

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