Welcome back, Magicians! Another week, another bonkers episode of The Magicians, am I right? “Plan B” revealed Julia’s secondary plan to getting rid of her demonic fetus. We also saw the gang come together, which tickled me pink because I’m a sucker for converging story lines. Are you ready to rob a bank? You may wanna go ahead and watch every movie from the late 2000s just to be safe. Onward, then! Spoilers are hiding in a vault with the gold, so beware!
We open with Quentin (Jason Ralph) back at his old stomping grounds – Brakebills. He is steeped in research on how to save Alice’s soul. Niffin Alice (Olivia Taylor Dudley) is trapped via the caco demon tattoo in Q’s back, if you remember. She is having a grand ol’ time taunting Quentin and seems to be on a mission to make his life miserable. Quentin responds to her antics in public, appearing to be talking to himself. He threatens to lock Niffin Alice in the box that originally contained her. She, on the other hand, attempts to dissuade Quentin from his mission to free Alice’s soul, saying that Alice is permanently gone. Niffin Alice also wants to take control of Quentin’s body for an hour a day. Backseat driver no longer! Quentin puts his foot down and tells her to shut it.
Meanwhile, Julia (Stella Maeve) and Kady (Jade Tailor) arrive at the location listed in the latter’s mother’s contacts. A butcher shop, of all places, is where Julia will receive her magical abortion. We see two women wave knives around Julia’s body, sensing the presence and nature of Reynard’s spawn. They tell her the fetus is entangled with her soul, so an exorcism is required. Just like the movies! They will perform said exorcism if Julia gives them one million pounds in gold upfront. Julia and Kady joke about all the pawn shops they’d have to raid for gold chains, but that’s serious stuff. I would go that route. It’s New York, there is literally a pawn shop every couple blocks or less. Julia also mentions robbing a bank, to which Kady asserts is plausible since they are magicians.
Later, in Fillory, our royal couple Eliot (Hale Appleman) and Margo (Summer Bishil) are in the middle of a meeting with their adviser Tick Pickwick (Rizwan Manji). Tick informs them that Lorian troops are heading their way. You know, the threat of war Margo made against Prince Ess and the people of Loria in the previous episode was taken very seriously. Margo insists she meant every word of it, despite Eliot’s reticence about the declaration. They are also attempting to clean out the Wellspring, which is still riddled with Ember’s leftovers. Tick reminds them that janitorial cleaning and war are both very expensive things, and Fillory is very broke. Money doesn’t grow on trees, even in a magical land.
Meanwhile, Julia and Kady scope out their bank of choice for their robbery. They discover that despite the bank existing in the Earthly realm it is protected by magical wards. While the two ponder their next course of action they are attacked by an invisible force. Suddenly, the trunk of Julia’s car swings open and out pops the Haxenpaxen they stole. It fights off the invisible demon and eventually dispels of it, but not without repercussions. Our poor Haxy (my pet name for it) suffers a fatal wound via wooden spoon. Unfortunately, the Haxenpaxen dies while holding Julia’s hand. She wants to give it a proper burial, but Kady thinks they need to seek asylum somewhere for safety.
Later, the two are at Brakebills. Julia is being inspected by Professor Lipson (Keegan Connor Tracy), who informs her that yes, an exorcism is necessary to get rid of the fetus. Dean Fogg (Rick Worthy) is also present. Lipson tries to persuade Fogg to let the girls stay for their safety, despite Kady’s expulsion status and Julia’s rejection from Brakebills. Fogg relents.
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Julia and Kady move into the Physical Kids House. Quentin sees them and is understandably confused. He follows Julia to Alice’s room, where she is staying. She remarks on how the former occupant’s belongings have been untouched. Niffin Alice appears and is displeased with this, since Julia is the reason real Alice is dead. Quentin apologizes for the state of things and vows to help Julia banish Reynard, as he initially promised. Aw. Friends for life, dead loved ones and demon fetuses be damned! He jumps on board for the bank heist.
Meanwhile, in the library, Penny (Arjun Gupta) is attempting to obtain a book for Mayakovksy so the latter will help heal his hands. Unfortunately, the book was destroyed due to it being Anti-Semitic. Feeling dejected, Penny is about to leave when he runs into Kady. After standing there awkwardly babbling for a few seconds, the two decide that makeup sex is the best course of action. Woohoo, makeup sex in a library! Also, I missed these two together. Love me some magical reunions.
Later, we see Fen (Brittany Curran) discovering her sleeping hubby in bed, which can only mean one thing…
Meanwhile, in Brakebills, Golem Eliot and Golem Margo divulge the details of their lack of money to Quentin. In response to bankruptcy Q suggests they join him and Julia in their bank heist. The High King and Queen graciously agree to this endeavor. We also discover that Margo has robbed a bank before. Of course she has, because she’s my favorite.
After their library makeup sex, Kady tells Penny the reason why she’s back at Brakebills. Initially Penny vehemently protests at helping Julia about, but after Kady tells him she owes Julia, he comes around.
Later, the whole gang is together for the first time, getting their drink on and hatching a game plan. Aw. Even though they all hate Julia this is kind of nice. Like I said, I enjoy converging story lines. Nothing like participating in a felony to bring people together! Margo takes the reins and divulges her master plan. Banks are protected by magical wards, so in order to gain access to the vaults they’d have to break said wards. After using two different finger prints to get inside, they will have ten minutes to break into the vault and make off with the goods before shit hits the fan. Or the Wellspring, to keep things Fillorian.
Penny will travel inside the vault but he can’t touch the ground, since vaults are also protected against travelers. If he touches the ground he’s trapped in said vault and will lose oxygen. Penny protests and reminds them that he can’t perform magic. Eliot and Margo will craft a device called a gravity belt that will allow him to levitate. Suddenly, another invisible demon launches an attack against out crew. Kady fights it off like a badass. Battle magic for the win! She notices the wooden spoon and takes it back to the butcher shop. One of the women there blames her partner, saying they wanted to kill Julia and the fetus so the spawn wouldn’t hurt anyone else. She urges Kady to hurry with the gold to save Julia’s life, since the demons will keep attacking until the latter is dead.
RELATED: Read All The Magicians Recaps HERE!
Later, Kady visits Julia in Alice’s room. Julia launches into a monologue about her role in the heist, but Kady stops her, saying she must stay out of harm’s way. Julia is disappointed but tells Kady she’s constructing a time machine of sorts, one with a spell that allows you to hop back in time in fifteen second intervals. Kady gives her friend her best bitches necklace and reminds Julia she can watch them through a mirror.
We see the gang outside the bank, where Margo pinpoints the managers of said bank. She informs the others they must perform a spell that requires them to stick the managers’ fingers in their mouths to gain their DNA. Sounds kinky. Kady and Quentin volunteer as tributes and each pick a manager for said spell. Later, back at the Physical Kids House, Kady reveals she now possesses a completely different finger for getting access to the vault. Quentin also has one from the manager he picked. However, he reveals he didn’t garner it from the woman sticking a finger in his mouth. Penny asks Q if he went “digital underground,” which simultaneously sounds like a dirty deed and a nightclub from the ’90s.
Later, we see the gang surrounding the bank. It’s the big day! Let the bank heist hi-jinks ensue! A horde of bees is released inside the bank lobby, causing customers to evacuate in a hurry. Golem Eliot, Kady and Quentin enter the premises dressed as beekeepers. They make themselves invisible on the cameras and quickly dispel of the bees. We see the guards of the vaults disappear to do the afternoon delight, leaving the gang’s targeted vault unattended. Kady and Quentin use their managerial digits to gain access to the area containing the vaults and break the magical wards.
Penny travels inside the vault, harnessed by the nifty gravity belt that allows him to levitate. Anytime he feels himself slipping toward the ground he presses a button that boosts him upward once more. Penny loads up with gold, but unfortunately gravity takes control and he’s in contact with the ground. Penny travels inside Eliot’s mind to the real Eliot in Fillory, to communicate with Golem Eliot on Earth that he is trapped in the vault. Talk about dream inception! I always thought that part of Penny’s abilities was so stellar. Golem Eliot, Quentin and Kady rush back inside to save their friend.
Meanwhile, in the bank, the guards have returned from their coitus to resume their posts. Golem Eliot has the perfect weapon of mass distraction. He throws a tiny disco ball known as a Wrecking Ball (the word play on this show kills me) in their direction. Said ball immediately plays music, complete with disco lights. The magic also forces the guards to dance to the music and eventually they conga line away from the gang. Methinks this bank needs to hire better, more attentive security that’s more impervious to magic.
So, our gang stands around the vault, realizing they still need a ten digit access code to get inside. Penny was their golden ticket since he could simply teleport himself anywhere. Niffin Alice drops a line to Quentin, saying she could easily get them inside with a spell. However, if she does this she demands to sit in the driver’s seat of Q’s body for an hour a day. They could even create a “word as bond” to make sure Niffin Alice upholds her end of the bargain. Quentin reluctantly agrees. She maps out a complex formula on the wall, which Quentin copies.
Fortunately, the spell works and they rush inside the vault to save Penny. They are preparing to escape when Quentin steps over the threshold, tripping the alarms. Damn it, Q! Meanwhile, Julia puts the finishing touches on her time hopping machine. I feel like Brakebills is really a breeding grounds for steampunk inventors. I love it. Back in the bank we see a stern faced woman react to the tripped alarms by hoisting a weapon and heading toward the vault. She is a battle magician hired by the bank. So intruders are killed on the spot? I wouldn’t want to rob this place.
The gang runs back into the safe, shutting the door behind them. The magician unlocks the vault door and all seems lost until time rewinds fifteen seconds thanks to Julia’s magical invention. Julia is outside with Margo. She informs Kady through their best bitches necklaces that they only have five chances to use the time hopping device to escape. Each successive opportunity results in the four of them dying instantly when they escape. They are down to their final time hop. Meanwhile, the invisible demon strikes again, knocking Margo unconscious and levitating Julia in a choke hold.
Kady urges Golem Eliot, Quentin and Penny to go in the opposite direction while she takes on the battle magician. They flee from the vault for a final time, but unfortunately Golem Eliot takes one for the team, getting zapped in the chest. Kady launches atop the magician and smacks her unconscious. Quentin stands over the now dead Golem Eliot, frazzled, until Penny reminds him that version of Eliot is made of clay and the real one is safe in Fillory. Meanwhile, we see the real Eliot begin violently seizing in his bed. Fen calls for a doctor.
Later, the trio stumbles upon an unconscious Margo and a gasping Julia. Kady dispels of the invisible demon and they tend to Julia, who is on the brink of consciousness herself.
We see Julia wake up in the butcher’s shop on a table. Kady informs her the exorcism was done, to Julia’s delight. However, there was a complication…
Y’all, that episode was killer. Loads of magic, which I always enjoy. I love how extensive and intricate the mythology on this show is – the spells are so unique and fun. We saw everyone work together, and I believe we might see them stay in tandem for at least a few more episodes. Just when things appear to be looking up for Julia, karma decides to keep her in her place. What do you think the “complication” was from Julia’s exorcism? Will Eliot wake up in Fillory, or will there be side effects from his golem dying? How will Niffin Alice and Quentin’s deal affect the latter’s continued quest to free real Alice’s soul? Will Penny’s hands ever be normal again? And lastly, will the gang decide to purchase a toilet for Ember so the Wellspring can be left unsullied? Till next week!
The Magicians airs Wednesdays at 9pm on your SyFy affiliate.
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What I do: I'm GGA's Managing Editor, a Senior Contributor, and Press Coordinator. I manage, contribute, and coordinate. Sometimes all at once. Joking aside, I oversee day-to-day operations for GGA, write, edit, and assess interview opportunities/press events.
Who I am: Before moving to Los Angeles after studying theater in college, I was born and raised in Amish country, Ohio. No, I am not Amish, even if I sometimes sport a modest bonnet.
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