Thank you to NetGalley/Ballantine Books for a copy of Rules for Ghosting in exchange for an honest review.
Summary of Rules for Ghosting by Shelly Jay Shore
Ezra Friedman sees ghosts, which made growing up in a funeral home complicated. It might have been easier if his grandfather’s ghost didn’t give him scathing looks of disapproval as he went through a second, HRT-induced puberty or if he didn’t have the pressure of all those relatives — living and dead — judging every choice he makes. It’s no wonder that Ezra runs as far away from the family business as humanly possible.
But when the floor of his dream job drops out from under him, and his mother uses the family Passover seder to tell everyone she’s running off with the rabbi’s wife, Ezra finds himself back in the thick of it. With his parents’ marriage imploding and the Friedman Family Memorial Chapel on the brink of financial ruin, Ezra agrees to step into his mother’s shoes and help out … which means long days surrounded by ghosts that no one else can see.
And then there’s his unfortunate crush on Jonathan, the handsome funeral home volunteer … who just happens to live downstairs from Ezra’s new apartment … and the appearance of the ghost of Jonathan’s gone-too-soon husband, Ben, who is breaking every spectral rule that Ezra knows.
Because Ben can speak. He can move. As Ezra tries to keep his family together and his heart from getting broken, he realizes that there’s more than one way to be haunted — and more than one way to become a ghost.
Oy Vey, Oh Yay
Shelly Jay Shore’s Rules for Ghosting is a lot. But that’s by no means a bad thing.
Ezra is one of those protagonists you simultaneously love and want to shake. He acts put-upon, but it’s mostly of his own doing. But, at the end of the day, you feel for him. He’s just trying his best, and he was dealt a pretty tough hand in life. I wouldn’t want to deal with seeing ghosts, especially while dealing with being trans in the world we live in.
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Rules for Ghosting does an excellent job of weaving its Jewish elements together with its supernatural ones. They’re actually not always so different. Ezra often seems to want to run away from both — or, at the very least, only minimally accept them. Throughout the book, he finds a comfort level in both those identities.
Ezra’s family life is also seamlessly integrated into the novel. The TV show Six Feet Under is kind of the benchmark for “family runs funeral home,” but Shore’s story is so different, and for how “messed up” the Friedmans are, the love shines through. It’s refreshing to read a family work through their problems rather than fall apart. While that’s not to say it isn’t OK for families to go no-contact, so much of millennial culture is about just that. Families of origin can work out the tough stuff, and Rules for Ghosting represents that well.
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A Magical Novel
For all its seemingly disparate parts, Rules for Ghosting comes together into one strong, magical novel. And Ezra is the rock who carries the whole thing. Whether you’re cheering for him or ready to throw a book at him, he’ll endlessly fascinate you. Little details, such as the fact that he constantly wears his binder for several hours longer than he should and that he’s a doula, make him feel real.
I highly recommend this novel.
Rules for Ghosting is out now. You can pick up a copy on bookshop.org or at your local library.
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