DISCLAIMER: This recap of Preacher episode “The Lost Apostle” contains more spoilers than the number of times Tulip has driven recklessly throughout the series. I’m starting to wonder how she acquired her driver’s license to begin with. You’ve been warned. Proceed with caution.
Welcome back, Grail members! Preacher is past the halfway point, with only four episodes of the series remaining. Sooner rather than later, this story will come to a close. While I’d love to see Preacher continue, I’d rather sacrifice my own selfishness in favor of a series closer that services the show as a whole. My hat is off to the Powers That Be for their decision to end the story on their own terms, as opposed to relentlessly beating a dead horse. We like our horses alive and kicking, not dead and…beaten.
Alright, ready to delve into “The Lost Apostle?” Just be sure to have Cassidy’s umbrella at the ready. He can’t venture outdoors without it – rain or shine.
We open with Abraham on the cusp of sacrificing his son to God. Yes, we’ve gone back that far. However, just before good ol’ Abe makes the death blow, God (Mark Harelik) conveniently steps in. He informs Abraham that the whole “killing your son” thing was a test meant to measure the latter’s loyalty to him.
Suddenly, we see the scene backtracking, as certain aspects of it are replayed over and over again. We see God, in the present, is watching said scene on a VHS tape. He’s sitting in his drab little trailer, complete with a table housing familiar figurines. There’s a figure of Jesse, one of God himself, the church in Annville and Tulip’s car. God is shuffling the pieces to his will, orchestrating events to fall in his favor. He rings up Herr Starr (Pip Torrens) and inquires of his heir Humperdoo. Starr, once again, fibs and claims that Humperdoo is getting his feet waxed. God orders Starr to await further instructions and the latter does as he’s bid.
Next, the remains of the Deputy Prime Minister of New Zealand arrive in New Zealand. However, they’re deposited courtesy a vehicle bearing Australia’s seal, making the Outback country the scapegoat in a vicious political murder. If you’ll recall, Starr was the one who slaughtered the Deputy PM during a summit in Masada. We see God assembling a figurine of a nuclear bomb inside his trailer, and it’s a dark omen of things to come for Jesse.
Meanwhile, Tulip (Ruth Negga) and Cassidy (Joseph Gilgun) arrive in Melbourne posing as American cops. We hear infectious ’70s beats playing as the pair pretend to be overly confident policemen. I’m digging these two as cops, and now I believe a Tulip/Cassidy spin-off is in order.
Now, the duo confer with the Melbourne police commissioner regarding Jesse’s whereabouts. They claim that America has a huge stake in the supposedly God-fearing homicidal maniac. However, the police commissioner reveals that Jesse is dead, and they have his killer in custody.
Then, Tulip grills Jesse’s killer…Eugene (Ian Colletti). Yes, Eugene. Arseface claims that he wielded the weapon and fired the killing shot. But Tulip doesn’t believe Jesse’s dead. Thus, she repeatedly asks Eugene where Jesse is until the latter finally relents.
Meanwhile, we see Jesse (Dominic Cooper) is alive, but not so well. The Saint of Killers (Graham McTavish) is torturing him. Later the following morning, after a night of immense torture, SoK wakes up Jesse and urges him to get moving. The mission? Find God. Kill God. Should be easy, right?
Next, back in Masada, Hitler (Noah Taylor) and Jesus (Tyson Ritter) are enmeshed in a convoluted debate over the impending apocalypse. Starr is overseeing said debate, but he’s currently preoccupied in receiving a phone call from the Almighty. The emissary from Heaven is reluctant to wage an apocalypse, but Starr reminds the pair that said apocalypse is inevitable. It will happen, whether Heaven and Hell like it or not.
Later, SoK and Jesse are on the road. The Saint of Killers claims that his gun can destroy planets, so of course it’s capable of taking out God. He orders Jesse to heel, but the latter is defiant as per usual. Jesse comes to the realization that, since SoK is keeping him alive, he’s crucial to the hunt for God. Thus, that means he’s calling the shots. We love a preacher in charge. Now, we see the duo walking toward a house nearby. Clearly, the Saint of Killers is going to waltz inside that house and incite the goriest violence possible.
Meanwhile, Tulip and Cassidy are on the case. Tulip learned of the Saint of Killers taking Jesse alive courtesy of Eugene. They make a pit stop at the very house from the previous scene. Tulip and Cass discover that the family within was brutally butchered. SoK’s handiwork, naturally. Our pair gets back on the road. However, they’re abruptly stopped short when they drive upon the infamous Outback. Nary a single steakhouse was in sight, unfortunately (sorry, I had to do it).
Next, we see two men stationed within the Outback who are tasked with guarding the entrance to The Lost Apostle National Park. Suddenly, a vehicle with an unseen driver fatally shoots one of the men and speeds past the entrance. We see the truck is carrying the same warhead God was crafting in his trailer. Coincidence? I think not.
Later, Tulip and Cassidy are sitting in a roadside diner planning their next move. A map is spread out before them, documenting any and all roadways accessible to them. Cassidy suggests they utilize Jesse’s letter for informational purposes, but Tulip reveals that she hasn’t even opened it. Cass offers to read it for her. After reading it, Cassidy comes to the conclusion that it contains nothing substantial in accordance with their mission. Tulip, flustered, heads outside for some air. That’s when she spots the trailer.
Now, Tulip barges inside God’s trailer and finds the figurines. She also spots the precariously placed latex dog costume. Tulip picks up a postcard with the image of The Lost Apostle National Park emblazoned on it. Bingo! Tulip departs the trailer in search of Cassidy with the news. We see God was intently watching her for the duration of this scene, hiding in the shadows. I knew it! This whole scenario was just too easy.
Meanwhile, Cass is experiencing a dip in his mood and in dire need of another substance to abuse. The waitress suggests a flame retardant that the diner keeps on hand. Eureka! When Tulip finds Cassidy outside, she sees that he’s already nose-deep in the aforementioned flame retardant. She reveals what she discovered in God’s trailer. It’s going to be difficult to get to The Lost Apostle park via car, but thankfully a private plane is perched across the way from them. Eureka times two! Neither of them have pilot’s licenses, but that doesn’t matter! Who needs training to fly a plane?
Later, Starr receives a phone call from God urging him to travel to Australia. He gleefully departs the dreadfully dull Apocalypse 2020 Summit at God’s behest. On to bigger and better things!
Next, we see Jesse and the Saint of Killers walking across the desert. Suddenly, a shadow of a small plane appears above them, and we know it’s Tulip and Cassidy coming to the rescue. They swoop downward toward the pair and spray the flame retardant everywhere, temporarily blinding SoK. Amid the chaos, Cassidy scoops Jesse up as the trio flies away, leaving the Saint of Killers in their flame retardant-infused wake. The band is back together again! Cassidy and Jesse seem to be putting their past grievances aside. However, Tulip is more resolute in her anger against Jesse.
Meanwhile, God is standing beside the massive rock formation in The Lost Apostle National Park. Starr runs up beside him, breathless. God, once again, inquires after Humperdoo’s well being. Starr, once again, proffers a lie. However, God isn’t falling for the ruse. Starr admits to losing the Messiah, but his team is on the case. Suddenly, a rabid dog enters the scene and makes a break for Starr’s family jewels. So, as opposed to God granting Starr physical beauty, the latter receives another bodily mutilation. As punishment, of course. While the dog is tearing apart Starr’s family jewels, God urges his follower to never cross him again. Brutal.
Now, we see our trio approaching The Lost Apostle rock formation. However, once Cassidy reveals how they discovered the rock formation’s whereabouts, Jesse urges them to turn back. God clearly planned it all in anticipation of their demise. We see God’s rage burst forth in an immense show of power – enough to knock the plane out of the sky.
Next, as the plane makes a nosedive, we see the doors are torn off. Jesse topples out, but before he can free fall Cassidy grasps his arm. Mates don’t let mates fall out of planes because of God. As Cass continues to hold Jesse in place we see the former’s arm catch fire. He is a vampire, after all, incapable of being exposed to the sun without bursting into flames. Jesse urges Cassidy to let him go so the vampire won’t go up in smoke. He also urges Tulip to read his letter to her. And with that parting wish, he lets go.
Then, the plane rights itself. Everything recommences in perfect working order. God’s plan to knock Jesse Custer out of commission went on without a hitch. However, Tulip and Cassidy are utterly heartbroken.
Now, we revisit the first scene from the Season 4 premiere. If you’ll recall, Jesse was falling from the sky. In this scene we see him fall again and crash unceremoniously into the desert wasteland below. We see he’s very, very much dead. Blood oozing from his ears and eyes. Eyes open and unseeing. Could this be the end of our preacher?
Alright – I’m not willing to accept that Jesse’s dead. However, it’s entirely plausible that our preacher reached the end of his rope, especially given that only four episodes remain in the season. But, on the other side of that, is there a series without Jesse Custer? Was Jesse the one roadblock, the ultimate hindrance to the apocalypse, and now that God slaughtered him said apocalypse can go on as planned? What’s going to happen to Eugene? Where is Lara Featherstone? Join me next week as I continue to recap Preacher, here on Geek Girl Authority.
Preacher airs Sundays at 10pm on your AMC affiliate.
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