DISCLAIMER: The following contains spoilers galore for Preacher Season 2. If you don’t want to be spoiled, I suggest you mosey on over to Hulu and binge Season 2. You’ve been warned. Say your prayers, and enter at your own peril.

Jesse Custer is not your typical preacher. For one, he smokes. Secondly, he drinks profusely. Thirdly, he’s utterly unfiltered. Oh, and he’s possessed by a being called Genesis. With Genesis, Jesse has the ability to force anyone to cater to his every whim. Now, that might sound like something out of a dream, but really it’s a pain in the keister to everyone else. 

Preacher Season 2 started with our core trio on the road, escaping a blazing and decimated Annville. Jesse learned that God is missing, and that the Almighty couldn’t care less about the peons suffering on Earth. Thus, our preacher hoped to track down the Creator himself to get some well-deserved answers. 

Unfortunately, the Saint of Killers was also on the loose, and he vengefully stalked Jesse beyond Annville’s borders. Thankfully, Jesse was able to evade him with the help of Genesis. Well, he used Genesis on a horde of guests at the hotel he was currently residing in and turned them on SOK. There’s power in numbers, you know. 

Later, our trio headed to the Mumbai Sky Tower after learning that Fiore was residing there. They also discovered that DeBlanc didn’t survive, and Fiore has been trying desperately to die. Cassidy and Fiore embarked on a drug bender of epic proportions. If you’re going to partake in the devil’s medicine at least do it with an angel and a vampire. Hey, that sounds like the opening line of a bar joke…

Joseph Gilgun as Cassidy, Tom Brooke as Fiore – Preacher _ Season 2, Episode 2 – Photo Credit: Skip Bolen/AMC/Sony Pictures Television

Anyway, Jesse received a heavenly tip that God is in New Orleans. Apparently, the Almighty has been on a jazz kick lately. Thus, our crew departed for NOLA. The Saint of Killers arrived shortly after the trio left. Fiore tipped the cowboy from Hell off regarding our crew’s intended destination. And, as thanks, SOK shot the angel. Just as Fiore wished.

Later, Jesse and co. arrived in New Orleans. They stayed with an acquaintance of Cassidy’s named Denis. Denis constantly barked at them in rapid-fire French. Then, Jesse met a lounge singer named Lara Featherstone. Our Preacher aided her in escaping a host of men in white suits – men who knew a thing or two about God. One more lead!

Meanwhile Eugene, our poor Arseface, is in Hell no thanks to Jesse inadvertently using Genesis on him. We saw that Eugene’s next door neighbor is none other than Adolf Hitler. Yes, Preacher went there. Eugene immediately began hatching an escape plan. 

Then, we discovered that Tulip was married to a man named Viktor. Tulip owed Viktor money. Oh, and Viktor’s cronies essentially kidnapped Tulip. 

Meanwhile, Jesse and Cassidy continued their search for God. They stumbled upon what appeared to be the Almighty’s “audition tape” for the job of God. Said video ended with God being shot in the head. Well…that’s a totally normal thing to do. However, the tape was just another piece to an intricate puzzle. 

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Then, we saw that Eugene was not doing so hot in Hell. Get it? Anyway, the torture rooms for each resident of Hell are out of commission. Thus, all residents were crammed into a stuffy room until the issue was resolved. In this version of Hell, “torture” is reliving a horrible memory over and over again. 

Later, Jesse learned of Tulip’s secret marriage. Let’s just say he was not a happy camper. Once he figured out where Tulip was, he barged over to Viktor’s house for a fun little torture session. Just light torture – nothing out of the ordinary. We also delved into Tulip and Jesse’s move to Dallas in a series of flashbacks, and witnessed the seeds of their young relationship blossoming. Well, more like bursting into flames. 

Dominic Cooper as Jesse Custer – Preacher _ Season 2, Episode 5 – Photo Credit: Alfonso Bresciani/AMC

Cassidy discovered Jesse’s diabolical torture plan and rushed over to prevent his friend from doing anything stupid. However, the Saint of Killers finished the job on Viktor and elicited the whereabouts of Jesse from Viktor’s terrified little girl. 

Finally, the Saint of Killers cornered the trio at Denis’ humble abode. Jesse accepted a deal from SOK that had a time stamp: one hour to find a soul to give the cowboy from Hell. We learned that a Japanese company was in the business of buying/selling souls, so Jesse started there. Tulip had a frightening run in with SOK, which led to some serious mental trauma for her. 

Jesse wound up giving SOK a piece of his own soul. Then, Jesse used Genesis on SOK and, with the help of Tulip, bound the cowboy in an armored truck. They disposed of said truck in a murky swamp. However, that won’t be the last of SOK. I guarantee it.

Also, we discovered that Denis is sick. Plot twist: Denis is Cassidy’s son! Denis pleaded with his father to save him, to turn him into a vampire. Cassidy was conflicted, but eventually made the decision to turn his son into a creature of the night. 

Then, we met Herr Starr, the head of an organization known as The Grail. Herr Starr set his sights on Jesse after he learned that the preacher was also on the hunt for God. Great minds! In a series of flashbacks, we saw how Herr Starr joined The Grail. Let’s just say I’d rather be initiated into a fraternity than join The Grail. 

Fredric Lehne as Saltonstall, Operatives, Pip Torrens as Herr Starr – Preacher _ Season 2, Episode 7 – Photo Credit: Michele K. Short/AMC/Sony Pictures Television

Tulip took up a new hobby – shooting guns at people wearing bullet proof vests. She began spiraling out of control after her encounter with the Saint of Killers. Cassidy continued to drink everyone under the table. Our heroes are complex ones, folks. Tulip even made friends with a new neighbor, who just so happened to be Lara Featherstone. Well, now it’s Jenny. Lara is also part of The Grail, working directly under Herr Starr. She was sent to spy on Jesse and his friends.

Meanwhile, Eugene enlisted in the aid of the Fuhrer for his grand escape. Apparently, Hitler knows Hell very well. Unsurprising. 

So, Cassidy turned Denis into a vampire – and what a feisty baby vamp is he. Cassidy found himself internally struggling with his decision, especially given how vampirism has changed Denis. Baby vamps, am I right?

Later, Herr Starr initiated B.R.A.D., a combat drone, to whip out Jesse after a SWAT team failed to do so. Cassidy and Denis went full on vamp on said SWAT team. So, the drone is unleashed. Starr called the drone off when he discovered that Jesse could be useful to him. The drone instead demolished Harry Connick Jr‘s house. May he fictionally rest in peace.

Finally, Herr Starr and Jesse connected. Starr gave Jesse the run down on what The Grail is all about – essentially preparing the world for the impending apocalypse. Jesse was introduced to Jesus, aka the Messiah. Well, the direct descendant of Jesus. However, this descendant is mentally unhinged. Thus, Starr wants Jesse to step into the Messiah’s shoes and comfort the inevitably terrified masses when the apocalypse arrives. 

Dominic Cooper as Jesse Custer, Tyson Ritter as Jesus Christ/Humperdoo, Pip Torrens as Herr Starr – Preacher _ Season 2, Episode 10 – Photo Credit: Michele K. Short/AMC/Sony Pictures Television

Next, Lara and her partner attempted to alienate Tulip and Cassidy from Jesse. Tulip decided to dispose of the Saint of Killer’s magical pistol after discovering that Jesse was hiding it. She mailed it to a random address in Brazil. That was after she tried destroying it to no avail, mind you. Hell guns are no joke. 

Suddenly, the Saint of Killers resurfaced and planned to resume his mission to rid the world of Jesse Custer. Jesse learned that Tulip and Cassidy kissed, thus a rift began to form between our trio. 

However, our crew decided to put their issues aside and flee New Orleans. Denis met his end when Cassidy shoved him into the sunlight. Vampires hate it when you expose them to the sun. Every time. Jesse accepted Herr Starr’s proposal, and began his new life as the world’s official Messiah. He even spoke to children at a Catholic school. Jesse also had a Jimmy Kimmel appearance lined up, much to his chagrin. However, Herr Starr reminded Jesse that he possesses the preacher’s soul fragment. Leverage!

Dominic Cooper as Jesse Custer – Preacher _ Season 2, Episode 13 – Photo Credit: Michele K. Short/AMC/Sony Pictures Television

Meanwhile, Eugene and Hitler enter the “Hole” in Hell, which will lead to the backdoor. Backdoor equals freedom, folks. However, both must endure their worst memories in the process. Eugene also must prove he doesn’t belong in Hell. Our precious Arseface stood up to his father in one memory, thus revealing a shaft meant for exiting Hell. Freedom! Oh, and when Eugene made it back to Earth a certain Fuhrer tagged along…and disappeared. Hitler is back, people. 

Later, Lara fatally shot Tulip after the latter uncovered her true identity. Unfortunately, Tulip died before Cassidy could turn her into a vampire. Cassidy and Jesse decided to take Tulip’s body to Jesse’s grandmother, who deals in the dark voodoo arts. Perhaps she can revive our Tulip.

Ruth Negga as Tulip O’Hare, Joseph Gilgun as Cassidy – Preacher _ Season 2, Episode 13 – Photo Credit: Michele K. Short/AMC/Sony Pictures Television

Oh, and God is dressed as a dog. Fact. We saw a blurry figure emerge from the blinding light of a hotel bathroom, and a dog costume laying nearby. If you’ll recall, Jesse encountered a man dressed in a dog costume in the basement of a pub in New Orleans. Of course, he assumed it was a kinky sex thing. But, alas. God was there. 

Alright, now you’re all caught up. Who needs TV when you have me, a humble and docile recapper? Just be sure to watch this space as I recap Season 3 of Preacher, here on Geek Girl Authority.

Preacher returns for Season 3 on June 24th at 10pm on your AMC affiliate. 

 

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