DISCLAIMER: This recap of the Kevin Can F Himself episode “New Patty” is laden with spoilers. You’ve been warned. Proceed at your own peril.
Welcome back, jaded sitcom spouses! It’s hard to believe there are only three episodes left of Kevin Can F Himself. While last week’s episode finally kicked the narrative into high gear, “New Patty” continued to propel that narrative forward in new ways. Allison’s plan to have Kevin overdose on oxycodone doesn’t pan out, but not to worry. Patty might know a guy! So, it appears our new fave dynamic duo will be hiring a hitman to brutally take out Kevin.
Mary Hollis Inboden and Annie Murphy continue to be tour de forces on this show. Particularly Hollis Inboden, who imbues the enigmatic Patty with understated layers. The show may sport Kevin’s name, but as far as I’m concerned, Kevin Can F Himself is Allison and Patty’s series.
Ready to delve into “New Patty”? Let’s get to it.
Now, we open right where we left off last week — Allison (Murphy) declaring to Patty (Hollis Inboden) that she’s going to kill Kevin. The pair are heading home from an eventful trip to Vermont. Patty dismisses Allison’s declaration, citing that the latter is just “having a day.” Who hasn’t wanted to murder their significant other at some point? Patty states that Allison’s “like wallpaper.” Utterly harmless. All bark, no bite. Allison reluctantly agrees with her.
Later, Allison is at the local high-end beauty store with that snooty employee. She’s looking for a concealer to cover the bruise on her wrist. Jenn (Meghan Leathers), Sam’s wife, enthusiastically greets Allison. There’s definitely a level of passive aggression between these two. It’s evident in this exchange. Jenn insists that they hang out sometime.
Allison leaves with a tube of concealer and some lipstick she surreptitiously pocketed when the haughty beauty clerk had her back turned. Ah, petty theft. However, Allison promptly discards the lipstick when she sees that it’s purple.
Meanwhile, Patty wakes up to find Kurt (Sean Clements) making her breakfast. He asks her if she thought about his marriage proposal. Patty admits that she hasn’t spared it a thought. This irritates Kurt. He wonders if there’s a point in them staying together if marriage isn’t inevitable. It’s not in the cards for Patty. Kurt breaks up with her. At least she got breakfast out of it.
Then, we see a sitcom-washed setting at the McRoberts residence. Patty is squeezed between Neil (Alex Bonifer) and Pete (Brian Howe). Allison arrives home to find a suspicious Kevin (Eric Petersen). He orders Allison to sit next to Patty. Both of them are on trial. Why? Because Kevin found a burger wrapper in the back of his car. It’s for an establishment in Vermont called Top Dog that was well out of the way of the supposed beauty expo.
Kevin procures what appears to be a murder board but for burgers. Henceforth, I shall refer to it as the “burger board.” Why wouldn’t they get Kevin a burger while they were at Top Dog? Kevin takes Allison out of the equation since she “likes salads.” But Patty should know better! He kicks her out of their friend group.
Next, Allison follows Patty outside. She reassures her friend that Kevin will come to his senses. Allison suggests that they “do something stupid.” She needs to feel alive! However, Patty’s not in the mood for stupidity.
The following day, we see Patty enter her salon to find a new patron. Nick (Robin Lord Taylor) is the nephew of Patty’s loyal customer, Cindy. Cindy harbors a nasty pill addiction. As it turns out, Patty was inadvertently selling pills to Nick as well as his aunt. But now the pill well hath run dry. Nick needs his supply, otherwise, Patty will pay the price.
Suddenly, Detective Tammy (Candice Coke), the officer who questioned Patty on last week’s episode, arrives on the scene. Patty insists that she doesn’t know anything. Perhaps the drug ring started and ended with that pharmacist? Tammy doesn’t think so. Then, Tammy asks Patty if the latter will accompany her to a work event. Is this a date, or …? Patty accepts the invite.
Meanwhile, Kevin, Neil and Pete are at the local pub. They spot a dude named Paddy (Jon Glaser) across from them. Kevin is entranced. He likes the cut of this man’s jib. So much that he asks Paddy to be their new Patty (Title of the episode!).
Next, we see Allison is hard at work at the liquor store. Patty waltzes in, snags a bottle of vodka and proceeds to do shots at the counter, much to Allison’s surprise. Now, it’s Allison’s turn to surprise Patty. After getting in a brief altercation with a customer, Allison quits her job. She throws down her smock, grabs a bottle of booze and stomps out. Just like that.
Then, Allison barges into Bev’s Diner and ushers Sam (Raymond Lee) into the back room. She starts kissing him. Sam’s a bit bewildered, but it doesn’t take him long to reciprocate the kissing. Get it, girl!
Later, Patty arrives at home to find Nick on her doorstep. He’s rather insistent, isn’t he? Of course, a volatile drug dealer knowing where you live is never a good thing. Patty tells him that her supply is out. The well dried up when the pharmacist was arrested. But Nick won’t accept that as a viable answer.
Next, Patty heads inside the McRoberts house with Allison’s coat in hand. She waits for her friend in the kitchen. That’s when she procures the bottle of oxycodone from Allison’s coat pocket.
Now, we see Allison and Sam post-fun session. Allison boasts about quitting her job, but that quickly morphs into an anxious spiral when she realizes that she won’t have money coming in. Sam offers her a job at the diner. She accepts it, and the two proceed to smooch again.
Then, Kevin puts Allison under the microscope when the latter comes home. Initially, Allison believes that Kevin knows about her tryst with Sam. However, Kevin pulls out his burger board, which also doubles as a “booze board.” He’s irked that she quit the liquor store. What about that 10 percent employee discount?
Later, Patty confronts Allison in the kitchen regarding the pills. Allison knows that Patty’s being stalked by the police and a wild card of a drug dealer. At the least, these could help settle her score with Nick. But Allison asserts that she needs them to kill Kevin.
So, realizing that her time might be limited, Patty knocks on Kurt’s door. She tells him that she made a mistake. Kurt’s all about stability, and she needs that! Kurt has moved on, though. After receiving a phone call from Kevin, Kurt’s decision to dump her became a resolute one.
Meanwhile, Allison asks Sam to whip up a burger that’s almost an exact replica of the famous Top Dog burger. It’s obviously for Kevin. Back at home, we see her dump the pill bottle into a bowl with an accompanying pestle. Then, she brings the burger out to Kevin. Allison claims that she found it on their doorstep with a note. Kevin surmises that it’s from Patty, to make up for her heinous crime.
Later, Patty enters the McRoberts house. She squares off against Paddy. Patty and Paddy. Apparently, Kevin and the boys are terrified of their new pal. Paddy notes that he doesn’t want his friends to be scared of him, so he leaves. Kevin accepts Patty back into the fold. He consumes the burger.
However, nothing happens. Allison never slipped the oxy into the said burger. She hands the bottle to Patty, so the latter can repay her debt to Nick. While this plan didn’t work, that doesn’t mean Allison’s throwing in the towel. Patty suggests that they pin the drug ring on Kevin. Better yet, have him go out in the goriest way possible. Maybe they can hire someone to kill Kevin.
This series is finally raising the stakes as well as leveling up Allison’s overall objective. Even introducing Nick and bringing Detective Tammy back into the fold elevates the drama for Patty. While the show was a slow burn at the start, we’re hitting the ground running with the remaining episodes.
I hope that Kevin Can F Himself can maintain this momentum for the rest of the season. It would be a shame to lose steam so late in the game. That being said, I trust the Powers That Be to deliver a compelling, gripping story for the last installments. Bring it on.
New episodes of Kevin Can F Himself air Sundays at 9 pm on AMC and are available to stream on AMC Plus.
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