DISCLAIMER: This recap of Harley Quinn Season 4 Episode 5, “Getting Ice Dick, Don’t Wait Up,” contains spoilers. 

Welcome back, Harlivy lovers! We’ve reached the halfway point in Season 4, and things are getting … icy. But also spicy? The episode titles this season are *Chef’s kiss*. Anyway, the Nightwing cliffhanger is easily the strongest one yet. Is he dead? He seems pretty damn dead. 

This outing digs into Ivy embracing her celebrity while Harley realizes she might miss being a villain. I love how their narrative journeys often mirror each other. Harley will inevitably learn she should accept both her hero and villain sides. We, humans, are multifaceted creatures, after all. Harley falls into the gray area between good and evil. I love the nuance and character detail here. 

As for Ivy, I think her inflated ego will drive a wedge between her and Harley. Only temporarily, of course. Harlivy 4 life. 

Ready to delve into “Getting Ice Dick, Don’t Wait Up”? Let’s get to it. 

RELATED: Check out our recap for Harley Quinn Season 4 Episode 4, “The First Person to Come Back From a Business Conference Without Chlamydia”

We open with Gordon (Christopher Meloni) getting ready for some sexy times with his wifey in a solitary cabin nestled on a snowy hill. Nora Freeze (Rachel Dratch) calls Gordon and hires him on the spot as the new security guard for the Legion of Doom. Sure, Joker forced Gordon into retirement when he abolished the police, but that doesn’t mean ole Gordy can spend said retirement making love to the woman of his dreams. He thrives in the action. He gets off on laying down the law. Naturally, he makes a beeline for Gotham. 

Meanwhile, Harley (Kaley Cuoco) tries to bond with Nightwing (Harvey Guillén), Batgirl (Briana Cuoco) and Robin (Jacob Tremblay). They lay the smackdown on some baddies. While fighting, Harley compares the Bat Fam to her former villain group. Batgirl is King Shark, Robin is Doctor Psycho and Nightwing is Clayface … because he’s so dramatic. That checks out. I love the moment during this fight sequence when Harley leaps in front of the moon, her cape flowing behind her, revealing the shape of a bat. Bat-Harley! Anyway, Nightwing isn’t interested in bonding with her. 

Nightwing, Batgirl, Harley Quinn and Robin stand on a roof in Gotham at night in Harley Quinn Season 4 Episode 5, "Getting Ice Dick, Don't Wait Up."

HARLEY QUINN Season 4 Episode 5, “Getting Ice Dick, Don’t Wait Up.” Photo courtesy of Max/Warner Bros. Discovery.

After she’s knocked unconscious because she can’t see in the dark, Harls attempts to fix her “night vision.” She goes to Supergirl (Lacey Chabert), who performs a procedure on her eyes. Now, she can see everything. Supergirl reveals Harley needs someone to take her home. She tries calling Ivy, who goes to voicemail. Nightwing refuses to pick her up. Batgirl also goes to voicemail (she has many of those on her phone). Then, Harley inadvertently calls Bane (James Adomian), who’s stuck in airport security. Stranded at the eye office, Harley falls asleep in the waiting room. Hey, at least she got that 15 percent off discount as a hero. 

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Next, Ivy (Lake Bell) basks in the glow of her post-MalCon success. Lex Luthor (Giancarlo Esposito) emerges with his cheeks almost to his eyes and a few strands of hair on his head. He’s desperately trying to look as young as possible. Lex gives Ivy his army of Jons (Paul W. Downs) as her personal assistants. She needs them now that she’s famous. 

Meanwhile, Nora shows Gordon around the Legion of Doom. He meets Ivy’s new mentees: Terra (Kerry Knuppe), Volcana (Jeannie Tirado) and Tefe (Vico Ortiz). Tefe’s father is Swamp Thing, who, if you recall, had a fling with Nora. Ivy’s “Natural Disasters” mentees meet with her for a brainstorming session. They present their plans for shaking up the status quo in Gotham. Ivy’s impressed. Unfortunately, before they can dig deeper into said plans, the Jons pull Ivy from the meeting. 

Gordon and Nora Freeze stand in the employee break room at the Legion of Doom while chatting with Terra in Harley Quinn Season 4 Episode 5, "Getting Ice Dick, Don't Wait Up."

HARLEY QUINN Season 4 Episode 5, “Getting Ice Dick, Don’t Wait Up.” Photo courtesy of Max/Warner Bros. Discovery.

Then, Batgirl’s roommate, Alysia Yeoh (Rain Valdez), picks up Harley from Supergirl’s eye office. Alysia was supposed to have her live-action debut in the now-scrapped Batgirl movie. Alysia reveals she used to idolize Harley when the latter was a villain. But now she’s part of the Bat Fam, which is lame. Harley asks Alysia where Barbara is (she claims they’re on the swim team together to hide Barb’s identity). Alysia claims Barbara usually disappears for a few days at a time. 

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Later, Harley stops by the Batcave to show off her new eyes to Nightwing. Nightwing chews her out for being late. He reveals Batgirl’s missing. She urges him to help her search for Batgirl, but Nightwing wants to work alone. He reminds her that they’re not family. He won’t even wear Harley’s friendship bracelet! Nightwing leaves Harley and her hyenas to sulk in the Batcave. Yes, Harley picked up two hyenas from the zoo. She would bond with hyenas. 

Meanwhile, the Jons attempt to persuade Ivy to boost her social media presence. That’s how you get more buzz. They also wrangle her into a photo shoot, which she eventually embraces. She goes on to appear on Tawny’s (Tisha Campbell Martin) show. Initially, Ivy seems uncomfortable surrounded by her adoring fans but slowly warms to it. Harley waits for Ivy outside the studio. She spots Nightwing lurking about. He claims he has a lead regarding Batgirl’s whereabouts. However, he refuses to disclose it to our Harls. Rude. 

Harley chats with Bane on the phone while she's in a doctor's office and he's in an airport in Harley Quinn Season 4 Episode 5, "Getting Ice Dick, Don't Wait Up."

HARLEY QUINN Season 4 Episode 5, “Getting Ice Dick, Don’t Wait Up.” Photo courtesy of Max/Warner Bros. Discovery.

Harley reunites with Ivy. She asks her if any of the Legion of Doom baddies kidnapped Batgirl. Of course, this crosses their self-imposed work/life boundaries, but desperate times, man. Harley’s mission leads her back to Batgirl’s room, where she falls asleep curled up with her hyenas. She’s even boasting a “Gordon Family Reunion 2014” t-shirt. Alysia finds Harley in Bab’s room. They look through Batgirl’s bank statement, discovering she presumably purchased a gun at a gun/ammo shop in the mountains. Harley asks Alysia to accompany her there. 

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Next, the Jons reveal they’ve ghostwritten a book for Ivy. They have her sign copies of said book at the Legion of Doom. Frank the Plant (J.B. Smoove) notices a difference in Ivy. Her ego has been inflated to an uncomfortable degree. She even ignores her mentees, aka the Natural Disasters. Side note: I love the title of her book, Poison Thrivy. Catchy as hell. 

Meanwhile, Gordon catches Terra, Volcana and Tefe leaving the Legion of Doom to put their evil plans into action. Volcana burns a hole in the crotchal region of Gordy’s pants. The trio laughs as they depart. Gordon locks up the building, pulls out a sleeping bag and sleeps next to the front desk. He’s all alone. How sad. 

Ivy sits on a couch with Tawny during filming of Tawny's daytime talk show in Harley Quinn Season 4 Episode 5, "Getting Ice Dick, Don't Wait Up."

HARLEY QUINN Season 4 Episode 5, “Getting Ice Dick, Don’t Wait Up.” Photo courtesy of Max/Warner Bros. Discovery.

Harley dreams about dancing with Ivy. The two chat about how impressed Nightwing is with her. Oh, and he loves the friendship bracelet. Suddenly, we see Harley trying to “sleep drive” while Alysia’s behind the wheel. They’re heading toward the Gordon family cabin but don’t know it yet. Alysia wakes up Harley; unfortunately, they crash into a tree. As they walk toward the cabin, Alysia wants to dissect why Harley’s sleepwalking. If you recall, we saw her sleepwalk in the final moments of last week’s episode. 

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Alysia reveals she did that, too, before transitioning. The sleepwalking represented the repression of her true self. Alysia believes Harley might be repressing her villainous side, and that’s why she’s sleepwalking. Harley lets that sink in. Then, they spot Captain Cold (Ben Levin) and his icy buddies having a cold bro weekend, yo. Harley and her hyenas start attacking the group. It’s a freezing brawl for the ages. Alysia spectates. Batgirl, aka Barbara, emerges from the cabin and calls Harley out as the latter pummels Captain Cold to a bloody pulp. Uh-oh. 

Gordon tries to heat a baked potato in what he believes is a microwave. When he pulls it out, though, it’s cold and unbaked, with a strand of white hair on it. As he pitches it, another potato materializes in what we see is a cloning machine. This time, the potato is steaming hot and very much baked. Gordon doesn’t question it. 

Ivy stands with the Jons in an office while looking at various potted flowers and plants in Harley Quinn Season 4 Episode 5, "Getting Ice Dick, Don't Wait Up."

HARLEY QUINN Season 4 Episode 5, “Getting Ice Dick, Don’t Wait Up.” Photo courtesy of Max/Warner Bros. Discovery.

Next, we see Harley, Alysia and Babs sitting inside the cabin while sipping hot cocoa. Barbara explains that she initially traveled to this cabin to bring her mom back to Gotham after her dad left to work security at the Legion of Doom. However, her mother abandoned her to party it up with Captain Cold and his pals. She left Barbara a note: “Getting ice dick, don’t wait up.” (Title of the episode!) Oh, and the ammo shop? The only place to buy groceries in the mountains. 

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Later, Ivy unveils a massive statue of herself outside the Legion of Doom to a cheering crowd. Volcana, Tefe and Terra approach her and reveal their plans spectacularly blew up in their faces. They could use some guidance. Unfortunately, Ivy brushes them off, claiming she has other responsibilities. Then, she poses before her statue while the media snaps photos of her. She’s a changed She-EO, y’all. 

Lastly, Harley and Barbara sit outside while roasting marshmallows. She finds a bullet in her quiche from the ammo shop, which, according to Barbara, means she’ll have good luck for at least a month. Suddenly, they spot Nightwing sitting in the tree above them. Aw, he’s wearing Harley’s friendship bracelet. However, he falls out of the tree and lands on their fire, putting it out. He looks to be very, very dead. Oh, no! 

RELATED: Catch up on the Harlivy goodness with our Harley Quinn recaps!

While “Getting Ice Dick, Don’t Wait Up” is better than last week’s outing, Season 4 is a little all over the place. I enjoy Harley and Ivy’s respective arcs but miss their scenes together. I also miss King Shark, Clayface and Joker. We need at least one scene with Harley and her original baddie gang. I suppose I’m longing for that togetherness. 

Do you think Nightwing is really dead? Who’s the murderer? Where the eff are Clayface and King Shark? Only time (and more episodes) will tell. 

Harley Quinn streams new episodes every Thursday on Max

Geek Girl Authority Crush of the Week: HARLEY QUINN

Melody McCune
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