DISCLAIMER: This Happy! recap contains more spoilers than the number of times Sax has been threatened to within an inch of his life. Every day is an adventure for our favorite hitman. You’ve been warned. Proceed with caution.

Welcome back, hitmen and hitwomen! Hitpersons? Happy! gave us an action-packed, pedal-to-the-metal episode this week. We were blessed with an imaginary friends support group, the newly reanimated corpse of Mikey Scaramucci, Hailey’s potential escape and Sax reuniting with Happy. However, on the flip side of that coin, Merry’s mother overdosed on prescription medication and that’s not something to be happy about. Pun not intended. 

Alright, ready to delve into “The Scrapyard of Childish Things?” Just be sure to keep an eye on Mikey. He’s like a hamster, which means he’s always looking for an escape route. 

We open with our favorite blue horse Happy (Patton Oswalt) attending a support group for imaginary friends. He’s as forlorn as a typically peppy horse can be. Happy opens up about his loss of Hailey, and in turn his disbanding with Sax. He fears what all imaginary friends fear – that one day their companions will stop believing in them and they’ll vanish from existence. 

After the meeting, Happy runs into another imaginary friend – a three-headed pink bulldog named Raspberry (Billy West). Raspberry is taking a long drag on a cigarette as he offers Happy sanctuary. Supposedly, there’s someone who takes in any and all imaginary friends. He has enough belief to keep them alive for many years to come. Happy, utterly taken with the prospect of finding a new home, accepts Raspberry’s offer. This smells fishy to me…

Meanwhile, Sax (Christopher Meloni) is in a photo booth with the newly resurrected Mikey Scaramucci (Gus Halper). Time for some BFF photos! Unfortunately, Mikey is not very forthcoming with details regarding Blue’s coveted password. In fact, he incessantly repeats “Blue”…and that’s it. 

RELATED: HAPPY! Recap: (S01E05) White Sauce? Hot Sauce?

Pictured: Gus Halper and Christopher Meloni

Later, Sax finds a church to deposit Mikey for a while. He convinces a preacher within to keep an eye on the reanimated corpse while Sax runs some errands. Our favorite hitman straps Mikey down as a precaution. The unfortunate preacher is reticent, but eventually allows Sax to leave Mikey in his care. Adventures in babysitting, anyone? 

Next, we see Smoothie (Patrick Fischler) is dolling up his captives in his sound stage classroom. Hailey (Bryce Lorenzo) looks like a porcelain doll. More accurately, she looks like a pageant contestant on Toddlers in Tiaras. Why is Smoothie dressing these kids up to the nines? Well, perhaps the better question is, why does Smoothie do anything? 

Then, Blue (Ritchie Coster) is attending his son’s school Christmas play with his wife. Sax decides it’s high-time to pay the mob boss a visit. He drops the knowledge bomb that Hailey is his daughter right in Blue’s lap. Blue is initially taken aback, but then he recovers. Sax demands to meet the crime lord that very night, and threatens harm on the latter’s family should he refuse to help Sax locate Hailey. Next, as a parting gift, Sax leaves Blue with a string of photos. Said pictures are the ones procured from the photo booth of Sax and Mikey. Blue is furious. The beast has awakened. 

Meanwhile, back at the church, our new preacher friend notices Mikey has escaped his restraints. He finds Mikey in the sanctuary, sitting in the confessional. The preacher plops down across from the once dead Mikey Scaramucci and offers to take his confession. Mikey simply mutters “Blue.” Then, he begins sputtering rapid-fire Latin. Very demonic. Our preacher flees the confessional box, scared out of his wits. 

Next, Smoothie procures a ruler and threatens to smack the hands of his captives if Hailey does not step forward. He wants to know whose father is a former police detective. If the real Hailey steps forward, she’s free to leave. A redheaded girl stands tall, wearing the name Hailey proudly. However, Smoothie smells the lie. He asks the girl her father’s name. The real Hailey spits out “Nick!” in an attempt to save her fellow captive. Smoothie turns to Hailey and informs her of Sax’s unfortunate demise. Hey, quit lying! Sax is alive and…alive. 

Pictured: Bryce Lorenzo and Patrick Fischler

Meanwhile, Raspberry takes Happy back to his new home. We see Blue and his family arrive in tow. So, this elusive believer in imaginary friends is Blue’s son? This won’t end well. 

Then, we see Mikey roaming the mean streets of NYC. He gets a big whiff of what Auntie Isabella is cooking – meatloaf! If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s following the scent.

RELATED: Read All HAPPY! Recaps Here

Later, Sax returns to the church to find Mikey has fled to the outside world. As he leaves to search for the newly resurrected Scaramucci brother to use as bait to lure Blue, he spots the animatronic Santa Claus on the church lawn. And the wheels begin to turn…

Next, Happy is introduced to Blue’s son. Blue’s young offspring wishes to play a rousing game of Russian roulette with his newly acquired imaginary friend. Thankfully Happy isn’t chosen to blow his brains out, but Mr. Pancake wasn’t so lucky. Happy quickly realizes his new owner is quite the sadistic little fellow. While attempting to escape, he stumbles upon a wall of fallen imaginary friends – cute and cuddly creatures strung up on display crucifixion style. Oh, the horror. The unimaginable horror. 

Later, Blue pays Merry (Lili Mirojnick) a visit after she returns home with her mother’s new medication. Her mother Jessica (Laura Poe) is fast asleep on the living room couch. Blue threatens the police detective in typical mob boss fashion, even throwing in a dig about how disappointed Merry’s dearly departed father would be in her. Not cool, dude. He even threatens Merry’s poor mother. 

Meanwhile, Isabella (Debi Mazar) is still preparing her special menstrual meatloaf meant (alliteration for the win) to attract Mikey. Her spiritual guidance adviser/Italian seer is rattling off an incantation of some kind. Oh, and The Secrets of My Sussex cast and crew are there for the whole thing. Mikey’s potential homecoming will be televised for all the world to see. Suddenly, they hearing rustling on the door step. Isabella opens the door to find Mikey standing before her! Oh happy day!

Next, Sax pays a visit to his dear old friend Le Dic (Michael Maize). He appeals to Le Dic’s friendly nature and asks him for assistance. Le Dic reminds Sax that he chopped off the former’s finger. Hey, why not let bygones be bygones? He asks Le Dic for explosives. Then, he attempts to pay for said explosives with the money he stole from Le Dic. However, Sax’s friend is feeling charitable and grants the hitman access to all the things that explode. 

Oh no, not Mr. Pancake!

Later, back at Blue’s house, Happy begins questioning one of the bound imaginary friends on the wall. He releases the injured frog from his restraints and urges him to run free. However, the frog perishes on the spot, too wounded to live on. Unfortunately, Raspberry tracks down Happy and unleashes his fury on our favorite blue unicorn. 

Meanwhile, Hailey plots her and her friend’s escape. Yes, Smoothie is scary, and so is Very Bad Santa. But what’s more frightening is the prospect of never leaving that classroom. She notices that Smoothie did not lock the door as he left. Hailey orders her friends to split into groups and rush through the door. Surely he can’t stop all of them, right? Thus, Operation Classroom Escape takes full effect. Our kids are almost free, but Smoothie returns and blocks their path. However, Hailey and the majority of the kids pointedly circle around him and exit. Methinks they aren’t truly free, though. 

Next, Sax arrives at Blue’s house, as promised. He claims to have Mikey in his trunk, and we hear pounding noises adding validity to that statement. Blue orders Sax to release his nephew. Sax procures an explosive from his pocket and threatens to blow up the whole neighborhood. However, said explosive is defective. Not to mention, Blue opens Sax’s trunk and finds the animatronic Santa within. Just the cherry on top. Blue orders Sax be put out of his misery in the garage. 

Then, Blue’s boys cart Sax into the garage to, well, shoot his brains out. Meanwhile, inside the house, Raspberry beats the tar out of Happy and strings him up on the wall. Suddenly, our little peppy horse finds his pep and stabs Raspberry with his horn, effectively demolishing the imaginary demon dog. Yay! He overhears Sax speaking through the vents and vows to find his partner. 

This is a normal Wednesday for our Sax.

Later, Merry’s mother wakes her from her slumber on the couch. She appears to be the most coherent we’ve seen her. She tells Merry the story of how her father really died, and how Blue is connected to it all. Then, she vows to take care of Merry now, to make up for all the years the latter has cared for her. Jessica enters the kitchen under the pretense of grabbing a glass of water, but suddenly we hear a glass break. Merry notices her mother’s pill bottle is empty. Jessica has collapsed from an overdose and, even with Merry’s tearful urging, appears to not be waking up. 

Next, just as Sax is about to meet his Maker, Happy bursts into the garage. Blue’s screaming boy follows behind the horse. Apparently, Happy scared the snot out of the little twerp. With the gunmen distracted, Sax takes them all out. There are guns and chainsaws involved. In fact, there’s heavy chainsaw involvement. Blue’s son and wife are cowering behind a car, bearing witness to it all. After Sax has effectively wiped out his enemies, he reunites with Happy. Happy appears to be close to vanishing from existence when Sax confesses his belief in his little friend and his desire to be partners again. This perks Happy right up. Yay! Teamwork makes the dream work! 

RELATED: Read All HAPPY! Recaps Here

Happy! only has two episodes left, and I wouldn’t be surprised if those two are the most action-packed of the bunch. This series is the perfect blend of action, comedy and gore. I’ve always asserted that if Tarantino could have his hand in television, this would be his series. Meloni appears to be having the time of his life with this role, and Mirojnick has officially solidified herself as someone to watch for. She truly has a knack for subtlety and nuance. 

Do you think Merry and Sax/Happy’s paths will cross in the next episode? Will Amanda also join Team Odd Couple (my name for Sax/Happy)? Did Hailey really escape? Will we see Very Bad Santa again? Join me next week as I continue to recap Happy!, here on Geek Girl Authority. 

Happy! airs Wednesdays at 10pm on your SyFy affiliate. 



Melody McCune
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